- Self - Host: I was very unhappy yesterday. I started to think, "Am I doing what I should be doing?" I could make an argument, and so could my agent, that I should be doing something other than this.
- Todd Barry: His eyes didn't light up when you said, "Web series?" You should start a podcast next. What do you want to do?
- Self - Host: I don't wanna do anything! That's the other problem.
- Todd Barry: Well, we're doing it.
- Self - Host: I love that you've never been in a sports car.
- Todd Barry: I know.
- Self - Host: It's like a guy who never had chocolate or saw the sun. So the whole idea of this thing is you wanna look stylish, you wanna feel fun-loving, so that other people are attracted to you as a vivacious individual.
- Todd Barry: So this could save me...
- Self - Host: It couldn't hurt.
- Self - Host: I look at you and I see a guy... I always think, "Boy, if I was him, I would be so happy."
- Todd Barry: You wanna trade for a while?