Modern Family (TV Series)
Schooled (2012)
Aubrey Anderson-Emmons: Lily Tucker-Pritchett
Quotes
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Mitchell Pritchett : [after a toast to Haley] And before everyone puts their glasses down, uh, uh, we're also very proud of Lily. Tomorrow is her first day of kindergarten.
Cameron Tucker : To Lily. And you'll be impressed to know that she's gonna be one of the smartest girls there. Lily, sweetie, what's the square root of 64?
Luke Dunphy : Nice trick. Hey, Lily, what's the square root of this potato?
Luke Dunphy : Congratulations. You have a parrot.
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Cameron Tucker : [Dropping Lily off at kindergarten] Oh, you know what? She forgot her snack.
Mitchell Pritchett : Oh.
Cameron Tucker : Where'd she go?
Lily Tucker-Pritchett : [a boy pulls on her hair] Ow! That hurts! Ow! That hurts!
Mitchell Pritchett : Oh, Lily, honey! Sweetheart, come here. Come here.
Cameron Tucker : [Picking the boy up and holding him against a pole] If you ever put your hands on my daughter again, I will string you up by your feet, run you up the flagpole, and let the birds peck out your eyes. You understand?
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Principal Roth : Okay, parents, we'll see you at 12:00.
Cameron Tucker : [Getting flustered] Oh! All right. Mm!
Principal Roth : This is when the crying starts.
Mitchell Pritchett : Does it ever stop? Okay, come on, Cam.
Cameron Tucker : Okay. You know what, Lily, sweetie? I know this is gonna be difficult...
Lily Tucker-Pritchett : [Running off] Bye!
Cameron Tucker : Okay. That was a knife to the heart.
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Cameron Tucker : [Lily's bedroom door is locked] Oh, they've got something over the hole. Lily!
Pam : Connor!
Mitchell Pritchett : We can't see anything from outside. The curtains are closed.
Susan : Open up, Connor! We'll let you have a hot dog!
Lily Tucker-Pritchett : What if something happened to them? What kind of hazards do you keep in there?
Mitchell Pritchett : [sarcastic] Well, let's see. That's where we keep our gun collection, our abandoned refrigerator, and our chocolate-covered hypodermic needles.
Susan : Why are gay men always so sarcastic?
Mitchell Pritchett : It's my coping mechanism!
Pam : Okay, that's it! Lily, Connor, if you can hear me, back away from the door. I'm gonna break it down.
Cameron Tucker : I'll help you.
Lily Tucker-Pritchett : I don't want Connor to go!
Connor : I wanna stay!
Susan : Oh, thank god they're alive!