- [last lines]
- Diane: Would you tell Tobias I never meant to hurt him?
- Special Agent Jethro Gibbs: Oh yeah, he knows... I think.
- Diane: I really liked him. But I never should have married him. I didn't love him. Just like you never loved me.
- Special Agent Jethro Gibbs: I liked you... I still do.
- Diane: But the only woman you'll ever love is Shannon.
- [Diane hands something to Gibbs]
- Diane: You were my Shannon, Leroy.
- [She leaves. Gibbs looks down and sees that Diane has returned his grandfather's watch, that he gave to her years ago]
- Special Agent Jethro Gibbs: NCIS!
- Tobias C. Fornell: FBI!
- Victor Sterling: DSC!
- Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo: DSC?
- Victor Sterling: Data Storage Co-Ordinator. Department of Homeland Security. Leroy? Tobias?
- Tobias C. Fornell: Violent take over. 2 dead guys. Missing Homeland Security official. You know what I'm thinking?
- Special Agent Jethro Gibbs: Victor was so desperate to get away from Diane, he had himself kidnapped.
- Abby Sciuto: Took you long enough.
- Special Agent Jethro Gibbs: What do you got?
- Abby Sciuto: Questions, and a lot of them.
- Special Agent Jethro Gibbs: Shoot.
- Abby Sciuto: Okay, first up: how quickly after you and Diane got divorced did she start dating Fornell? Because that must've been you know - awkward.
- [Gibbs stares at Abby]
- Abby Sciuto: Heh. Um okay, we'll just - we'll just circle back to that one. Question number 2: Were you jealous?
- [Gibbs stares at Abby]
- Abby Sciuto: Okay, so I see you're not ready to talk about this yet. Um, could I get a - a do-over?
- Special Agent Jethro Gibbs: [Gibbs leaves the lab, then re-enters] What do you got, Abs?
- Abby Sciuto: Security footage.
- Special Agent Jethro Gibbs: Condom underneath the fold? Really, Tobias?
- Tobias C. Fornell: Same one I had in college. I never used it. I just like what it represents.
- Special Agent Jethro Gibbs: Hope?
- Tobias C. Fornell: What are you doing here?
- Special Agent Jethro Gibbs: I was going to ask you the same thing.
- Tobias C. Fornell: She called both of us. That can't be good.
- Carol Wilson: But times have changed. It's now possible to build a synthetic virus from scratch using a numerical recipe just like this, and gene sequences you can get online.
- Tobias C. Fornell: I keep saying it: things were better before the Internet.
- Tobias C. Fornell: Wait. Wait. Wait. She may be the spawn of Satan, but she's also the mother of my child. *No way* Diane's involved.
- Special Agent Jethro Gibbs: Rule 69: Never trust a woman who doesn't trust her man.
- Victor Sterling: Not too bad for two guys who missed the wedding.
- Special Agent Jethro Gibbs, Tobias C. Fornell: [Gibbs and Fornell exchange glances then turn to Victor] Work.
- Victor Sterling: You're forgiven.
- Leon Vance: Next part of this investigation is going to step on a lot of toes. You left me a bone sandwich, Gibbs.
- Special Agent Jethro Gibbs: Oh, I cut the crust off for you.
- Leon Vance: FBI does have the lead. Good luck, Agent Fornell.
- Tobias C. Fornell: Thanks.
- Special Agent Jethro Gibbs: Oh, cheer up, Tobias. At least you'll never have to talk with Diane again.
- Tobias C. Fornell: I have a child with her.
- Special Agent Jethro Gibbs: Oh that's right. Guess I won't have to.
- Ziva David: You two are being ridiculous! Everyone's hair thins. It's barely noticeable.
- [Gibbs enters behind her]
- Ziva David: I mean, it's not like you guys are going grey.
- [Tony and McGee look over her shoulder. Realizing Gibbs is behind her, Ziva winces and turns to face him]
- Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo: I'm so glad that wasn't me.
- Ziva David: Grey can be... really sexy.
- Diane: I want you to look into it... Okay, I know what you guys are thinking, but Victor is not the kind of man to just disappear.
- Special Agent Jethro Gibbs: Not sure how to say this.
- Tobias C. Fornell: I do!... Look, we are not your personal buddy cop investigative service.
- Diane: No, you're just my ex-husbands, and I need your help.
- Diane: Look, I know there's no love lost between us.
- Tobias C. Fornell: Well that's not...
- Diane: Zip it, you!
- Tobias C. Fornell: Where's Gibbs?
- Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo: Down in Abby's lab.
- Tobias C. Fornell: Where's... her?
- Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo: Diane's getting something to eat.
- Tobias C. Fornell: Hope she kills it first.
- Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo: Yeah, she's pretty fiery. Can't be all bad, you married her.
- Special Agent Jethro Gibbs: [Gibbs enters] Don't remind him.
- Leon Vance: Did you ask his wife about the money?
- Special Agent Jethro Gibbs: Not yet.
- Leon Vance: Are you going to?
- Special Agent Jethro Gibbs, Tobias C. Fornell: He can.
- Special Agent Jethro Gibbs: I don't think she knows about it.
- Leon Vance: Well, have fun finding out, Agent Fornell. I spoke to your boss. We have a dead Naval Reservist, but kidnapping is your territory.
- Special Agent Jethro Gibbs: Fine with me.
- Leon Vance: Agent Fornell will take the lead... Excuse me?
- Special Agent Jethro Gibbs: Works for me.
- Tobias C. Fornell: Well, it doesn't for me. Any chance we can flip for it?
- Leon Vance: No. National Security trumps your ex-wife issues. She can't be all bad, you married her.
- Dr. Donald Mallard: [to a dead body] For instance, in Ireland, divorce wasn't legalized until 1997.
- Tobias C. Fornell: [Gibbs and Fornell enter] Thank God I'm not Irish. Can you imagine being stuck with her?
- Special Agent Jethro Gibbs: Don't have to imagine. We are, unless you can pull a rabbit out of that body.
- Victor Sterling: [Diane enters Interogation. Victor rises] Diane, I am so glad to see you.
- Diane: You get the Hell away from me! Two million dollars? And I've been worried about how we're going to pay the mortgage!
- Special Agent Jethro Gibbs: [Victor looks at Gibbs and Fornell] You're on your own.
- Diane: Well?
- Victor Sterling: It's family money.
- Diane: Have you just been waiting all these years? An opportunity to twist the knife in?
- Special Agent Jethro Gibbs: No, no. That's your specialty.
- Diane: You way of getting even for leaving you?
- Special Agent Jethro Gibbs: I should give you a medal.
- Diane: Yeah, well if there is a medal, I do deserve it - for staying so long. You know it isn't easy being a human anti-depressant. What, you didn't think I knew you just married me to get over Shannon?
- [awkward silence]
- Diane: ... Sorry. That- that was... I'm scared, Leroy.
- Diane Gibbs Fornell Sterling: Thank you both for coming. I didn't know who else to call.
- T.C. Fornell: We kind of figured that...
- Leroy Jethro Gibbs: When you called us.
- Diane: [furious] You didn't trust me, but you married me anyway? I am going to make your life a living hell!
- [in the corner, Gibbs and Fornell trade a smirk]
- Victor Sterling: [stands] Diane... I'm okay, baby. I'm safe now.
- Diane: [melting, throwing her arms around him and crying] I was so scared...
- Victor Sterling: It's okay, it's okay...
- [in the corner, Gibbs and Fornell trade a severely confused look]
- [Diane storms into Vance's office]
- Diane: When the hell were you going to tell me?
- Tobias C. Fornell: Speak of the Devil.
- Leon Vance: You must be Mrs...
- Diane: Two million dollars? Victor has two million dollars?
- Timothy McGee: Boss, she made me tell her.
- Tobias C. Fornell: Who needs enhanced interrogation?
- Diane: What else haven't you told me?
- Special Agent Jethro Gibbs: Can we talk about this downstairs?
- Diane: What, you have a basement here, too, Mr. Woodchuck?
- Leon Vance: Mrs. Sterling! I'm Director Vance. Rest assured, my agents are doing everything possible to find your husband.
- Diane: Thank you. Just make sure they keep me informed, too.
- [indicating McGee]
- Diane: Wasn't any fun trying to pry information out of Macaulay Culkin here.