Django Unchained (2012)
Christoph Waltz: Dr. King Schultz
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Quotes
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Dr. King Schultz : [aiming .45-70 rifle at fleeing Ellis Brittle] You sure that's him?
Django : Yeah.
Dr. King Schultz : Positive?
Django : I don't know.
Dr. King Schultz : You don't know if you're positive?
Django : I don't know what 'positive' means.
Dr. King Schultz : It means you're sure.
Django : Yes.
Dr. King Schultz : Yes, what?
Django : Yes, I'm sure that's Ellis Brittle.
[Schultz shoots Brittle off his horse]
Django : I'm positive he dead.
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Calvin Candie : White cake?
Dr. King Schultz : I don't go in for sweets, thank you.
Calvin Candie : Are you brooding 'bout me getting the best of ya, huh?
Dr. King Schultz : Actually, I was thinking of that poor devil you fed to the dogs today, D'Artagnan. And I was wondering what Dumas would make of all this.
Calvin Candie : Come again?
Dr. King Schultz : Alexander Dumas. He wrote "The Three Musketeers." I figured you must be an admirer. You named your slave after his novel's lead character. If Alexander Dumas had been there today, I wonder what he would have made of it?
Calvin Candie : You doubt he'd approve?
Dr. King Schultz : Yes. His approval would be a dubious proposition at best.
Calvin Candie : Soft hearted Frenchy?
Dr. King Schultz : Alexander Dumas is black.
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Dr. King Schultz : How do you like the bounty hunting business?
Django : Kill white folks and they pay you for it? What's not to like?
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Calvin Candie : [to Django] So, bright boy, Moguy tells me you looked over my African flesh and you was none too impressed, huh?
Django : Not for top dollar.
Calvin Candie : Well, then, we got nothing more to talk about. You see, you want to buy a beat ass nigger from me, those are the beat ass niggers I want to sell, so...
Django : He don't wanna buy the niggers you wanna sell. He wants the nigger you don't wanna sell.
Calvin Candie : Well, I don't sell the niggers I don't wanna sell.
Dr. King Schultz : Well, you won't sell your best. You won't even sell your second best, but your third best? You don't wanna sell either, but if I made you an offer so ridiculous, you'd be forced to consider it?
[laughs]
Dr. King Schultz : Who knows what could happen?
Calvin Candie : And what do you consider "ridiculous?"
Dr. King Schultz : For a truly talented specimen, the right nigger? How much would you say, Django?
Django : ...12,000 dollars.
Calvin Candie : Gentlemen, you had my curiosity, now you have my attention.
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Dr. King Schultz : [to Django after shooting Calvin] I'm sorry...
[pause]
Dr. King Schultz : I couldn't resist.
[Butch raises his gun and shoots at Schultz]
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Dr. King Schultz : Well, Brünnhilde was a princess. She was a daughter of Wotan, god of all gods. Anyways, Her father is really mad at her.
Django : What she do?
Dr. King Schultz : I can't exactly remember. She disobeys him in some way. So he puts her on top of the mountain.
Django : Broomhilda's on a mountain?
Dr. King Schultz : It's a German legend, there's always going to be a mountain in there somewhere. And he puts a fire-breathing dragon there to guard the mountain. And he surrounds her in a circle of hellfire. And there, Brünnhilde shall remain. Unless a hero arises brave enough to save her.
Django : Does a fella arise?
Dr. King Schultz : Yes, Django, as a matter of fact, he does. A fella named Siegfried.
Django : Does Siegfried save her?
Dr. King Schultz : [Nods] Quite spectacularly so. He scales the mountain, because he's not afraid of it. He slays the dragon, because he's not afraid of him. And he walks through hellfire... because Brünnhilde's worth it.
Django : I know how he feel.
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Dr. King Schultz : Mister Candie, normally I would say "Auf wiedersehen," but since what "auf wiedersehen" actually means is "'till I see you again", and since I never wish to see you again, to you, sir, I say goodbye!
[Dr. Schultz turns around to leave with Django and Broomhilda]
Calvin Candie : [Candie sulks in his library chair for a brief moment as he watches Schultz walk out. He then raises his hand to stop the doctor] Hmm! One more moment, Doctor!
Dr. King Schultz : [stops and faces Candie] What?
Calvin Candie : [Candie raises out of his chair] It's a custom here in the South once a business deal is concluded that the two parties shake hands. It implies good faith...
Dr. King Schultz : I'm not from the South...
[Schultz turns again]
Calvin Candie : But you are in my house, Doctor! So, I'm afraid I must insist...
Dr. King Schultz : Insist? On what? That I shake your hand?
[pause]
Dr. King Schultz : Then I'm afraid I must insist in the opposite direction!
Calvin Candie : [Calvin walks closer to the German doctor] You know what I think you are?
Dr. King Schultz : What you think I am? No, I don't!
Calvin Candie : I think you are a bad loser!
Dr. King Schultz : And I think you're an abysmal winner!
Calvin Candie : Never the less, here in Chickasaw County, a deal ain't done till the two parties have shook hands. Even after all that paper signin', don't mean shit you don't shake my hand.
Dr. King Schultz : And if I don't shake your hand, you're gonna throw away $12,000? I don't think so!
Calvin Candie : Mr. Pooch, if she tries to leave here before this nigger-loving German shakes my hand, you cut her ass down!
[Butch turns around to Broomhilda and clicks his gun. Django stands in front of Broomhilda to protect her in case she gets shot; he looks at Schultz. Dr. Schultz glares back at Django with an angry look on his face]
Dr. King Schultz : [Dr. Schultz turns back at Candie] You REALLY want me to shake your hand?
Calvin Candie : [Candie holds out his hand and smirks] I insist!
Dr. King Schultz : Oh, if you insist...
[Schultz smiles and walks up to Candie, pretending to willfully shake his hand; he instead raises a tiny gun hidden under his sleeve and shoots Candie in the chest]
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Dr. King Schultz : [after Calvin Candie brings a box into his dining room and takes a human skull out of it] Who is your little friend?
Calvin Candie : This is Ben. He's a old Joe that lived around here for a long time. And I do mean a long damn time. Old Ben here took care of my daddy and my daddy's daddy, till he up and keeled over one day. Old Ben took care of me. Growing up the son of a huge plantation owner in Mississippi puts a white man in contact with a whole lot of black faces. I spent my whole life here right here in Candyland, surrounded by black faces. And seeing them every day, day in day out, I only had one question. Why don't they kill us? Now right out there on that porch three times a week for fifty years, old Ben here would shave my daddy with a straight razor. Now if I was old Ben, I would have cut my daddy's goddamn throat, and it wouldn't have taken me no fifty years to do it neither. But he never did. Why not? You see, the science of phrenology is crucial to understanding the separation about two species. In the skull of the African here, the area associated with submissiveness is larger than any human or other sub-human species on planet Earth. If you examine this piece of skull here, you'll notice three distinct dimples. Here, here and here. Now if I was holding a skull of a... of an Isaac Newton or Galileo, these three dimples would be in the area of the skull most associated with creativity. But this is the skull of old Ben, and in the skull of old Ben unburdened by genius, these three dimples exist in the area of the skull most associated with servility.
[Turns to Django]
Calvin Candie : Now bright boy, I will admit you are pretty clever. But if I took this hammer here and I bashed it in your skull, you would have the same three dimples in the same place as old Ben.
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Dr. King Schultz : [in disbelief] Let me get this straight: Your slave wife speaks German and her name is Broomhilda von Schaft?
Django : Yep.
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Dr. King Schultz : You silver tongued devil, you.
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Dr. King Schultz : I wish to parley with you.
Dicky Speck : Speak English.
Dr. King Schultz : Oh, I'm sorry, please forgive me. it *is* a second language.
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Ace Speck : [as Dr. Schultz questions Django] Hey! Stop talking to him like that.
Dr. King Schultz : [looks to Ace] Like what?
Ace Speck : Like that.
Dr. King Schultz : My dear sir, I am simply trying to ascertain...
Ace Speck : Speak English, goddamn it.
Dr. King Schultz : Everybody calm down. I'm simply a customer trying to conduct a transaction.
Ace Speck : I don't care. No sale. Now off with you.
Dr. King Schultz : Oh don't be ridiculous. Of course they're for sale.
Ace Speck : [points shotgun at Schultz] Move it.
Dr. King Schultz : My good man, did you simply get carried away with your dramatic gesture, or are you pointing your weapon at me with lethal intention?
Ace Speck : [cocks shotgun] Last chance, fancy pants.
Dr. King Schultz : Oh well, very well.
[pulls out pistol and shoots Ace and Dicky's horse]
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Django : What'a a bounty?
Dr. King Schultz : It's like a reward.
Django : You kill people? And they give you a reward?
Dr. King Schultz : Certain people, yeah...
Django : Bad people?
Dr. King Schultz : [grins] Ah! Badder they are, bigger the reward.
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Calvin Candie : Dr. Schultz, in Greenville, you yourself said that for the right nigger you'd be willing to pay what some may consider is a ridiculous amount. To which me myself said "What is your definition of ridiculous?" To which you said "$12,000." Now, considering y'all have ridden a whole lot of miles...
[Candie aggressively grabs Broomhilda's head, she whimpers as Django looks on intensively]
Calvin Candie : ... went through a whole lot of trouble...
[Candie continues holding Broomhilda's head, and starts rubbing her face]
Calvin Candie : ... and done spread a whole lot of bull to purchase this lovely lady right here, it would appear that Broomhilda is in fact the right nigger. And if y'all wanna leave Candyland with Broomhilda, the price... is $12,000.
Dr. King Schultz : And I take it you prefer the take it or leave it style of negotiation?
Calvin Candie : [Candie lets go of Broomhila's head] Yes, I do, Doctor. You see, under the laws of Chickasaw County, Broomhilda, here, is my property... and I can choose to do with MY PROPERTY... WHATEVER I SO DESIRE!
[Candie rubs his injured hand and smears the blood all over Broomhilda's face; she shrieks and moans in disgust and fear]
Calvin Candie : And if y'all think my price for this nigger here is too steep, what I'm gonna desire to do is...
[Candie causally sets his cigarette down; he suddenly but quickly picks up his hammer and violently grabs hold of Broomhilda's hair, slamming her face on the dinner table and raising the hammer above her head. Schultz jumps while Django rises up out of his seat]
Calvin Candie : TAKE THIS GODDAMNED HAMMER HERE, AND BEAT HER ASS TO DEATH WITH IT! RIGHT IN FRONT OF BOTH YA'LL! THEN WE CAN EXAMINE THE THREE DIMPLES INSIDE BROOMHILDA'S SKULL! NOW... WHAT'S IT GONNA BE DOC? HUH? WHAT'S IT GOING TO BE?
Dr. King Schultz : [Screams back nervously] May I lift my hands off the table in order to remove my billfold?
Calvin Candie : YES, you may!
[Schultz quickly retrieves his wallet out of his pocket and tosses it on the table; Stephen grabs it and starts counting the money]
Stephen : [Nods to Calvin with the cash] That twelve.
[Candie greedily smiles as Stephen drops the cash in front of him]
Calvin Candie : [Lets go of Broomhilda's head and slams the hammer loudly on the table] SOLD... TO THE MAN WITH EXCEPTIONAL BEARD, AND HIS UNEXCEPTIONAL NIGGER!
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Dr. King Schultz : And as if on cue, here comes the sheriff!
Sheriff Bill Sharp : [Comes in tavern] Okay, boys, fun's over! Come on out.
[Bill Sharp leads Schultz and Django outside while an anxious crowd watches]
Sheriff Bill Sharp : Alright folks, calm down! Go about your business. The jokers will be gone soon.
[Turns to Schultz and Django]
Sheriff Bill Sharp : Now, why do ya'll wanna come into my town and start trouble? And scare all of these nice people? You ain't got nothing better to do than to come into Bill Sharp's town and show your ass-!
[Dr. Schultz suddenly raises his derringer and shoots the sheriff in the stomach]
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Dr. King Schultz : Now, anything else about Mr. Candie that I should know about before I meet him?
Leonide Moguy : Yes, he is a bit of a Francophile.
Dr. King Schultz : Ha! What civilized people aren't?
Leonide Moguy : And he prefers "Monsieur Candie" to "Mr. Candie".
Dr. King Schultz : Si c'est cela qu'il préfère.
[Subtitle: Whatever he prefers]
Leonide Moguy : He doesn't speak French. Don't speak French to him; it'll embarrass him.
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Dr. King Schultz : How long have you been associated with Mr. Candie?
Leonide Moguy : Oh, Calvin's father and I were about eleven when we went to boarding school together. Calvin's father's father put me through law school. One could almost say I was raised to be Calvin's lawyer.
Django : One could almost say youse a nigga.
Leonide Moguy : What did you say?
Django : I said...
Dr. King Schultz : Nothing; he's just being cheeky.
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Dr. King Schultz : Let's just hope she works in the house, not in the field.
Django : Oh, no, she ain't no field nigger. She... She pretty. And she talk good, too. But when they tore her back up and then they... burned that runaway "r" on her cheek... they goddamned her. She ain't no field nigger but she ain't good enough for the house no more either. They gonna try to make her a comfort girl.
Dr. King Schultz : What's a comfort...? Oh.
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Calvin Candie : [to Stephen] Stephen, when you get through showing them to their rooms, go fetch Hildi. Get her cleaned up and smellin' real nice and send her over to Dr. Schultz's room.
Stephen : [laughing] Actually, Monsieur Candie sir, there's something I ain't told you about yet.
Calvin Candie : What?
Stephen : Uh, Hildi 'in the hot box.
Calvin Candie : Well what's she doin' there?
Stephen : What you think she doin' there, in the hot box? She been punished!
Calvin Candie : Well what did she do?
Stephen : She run off again.
Calvin Candie : Jesus Christ, Stephen! How many people run away while I was gone?
Stephen : Two.
Calvin Candie : Well when did she go?
Stephen : Last night. They brung her back this morning.
Calvin Candie : How long she been in the box?
Stephen : How long you think she been in there? All damn day! And the little bitch got ten more days to be in there.
Calvin Candie : Take her out.
Stephen : Take her out? Why?
Calvin Candie : Because I said so, that's why! Dr. Schultz is my guest. Hildi is my nigger. Southern hospitality dictates I make her available to him.
Stephen : But Monsieur Candie, she run off.
Calvin Candie : Christ, Stephen! What is the point of having a nigger that speaks German if you can't wheel 'em out when you have a German guest? Now I realize it is an inconvenience. Still, you take her ass out!
Stephen : Yes sir.
Dr. King Schultz : Lori Lee! Will you and Cora be responsible for getting her cleaned up and presentable for Dr.Schultz, here?
Lara Lee Candie-Fitzwilly : Of course, darling.
Calvin Candie : Now, gentlemen, I do apologize; but, I am weary from our travels beyond words. It is time for me to rest my tired eyes.
[kisses Lori Lee on the lips]
Stephen : [to the Overseers] Ya'll done heard the man! Get her ass up outta there! Go! Come here. Get her over there and get her cleaned up and bring her back over here to, uh, Doctor -
[to Schultz]
Stephen : What did you say your name was? Shoots?
Dr. King Schultz : Shultz.
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Dr. King Schultz : My name is Dr. King Schultz, and like yourself, Marshall, I am a servant of the court. The man lying dead in the dirt, who the good people of Daughtrey saw fit to elect as their sheriff, who went by the name of Bill Sharp, is actually a wanted outlaw by the name of Willard Peck, with a price on his head of 200 dollars. Now, that's 200 dollars, dead or alive.
U.S. Marshall Gill Tatum : The hell you say!
Dr. King Schultz : I'm aware this is probably disconcerting news. But I'm willing to wager this man was elected sheriff sometime in the last two years. I know this because three years ago, he was rustling cattle from the B.C. Corrigan Cattle Company of Lubbock, Texas. Now, this is a warrant, made out by circuit court Judge Henry Allen Laudermilk of Austin Texas. You're encouraged to wire him. He'll back up who I am, and who your dear departed sheriff was. In other words Marshall... you owe me 200 dollars.
Django : I'll be damned!
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Dr. King Schultz : Do most slaves believe in marriage?
Django : Oh, me and wife did. Old Man Carrucan didn't. That's why we, uh, we run off.
Old Man Carrucan : [During Django's flashback when he was a slave on the Carrucan plantation] Django... Django... Django... You got sand, Django. Boy's got sand! I got no use for a nigger with sand.
[Django, with a metal collar around his neck and face, looks on]
Old Man Carrucan : I want you to burn a runaway "R" right here on his cheek, and the girl, too.
[Django groans]
Old Man Carrucan : And I want you to take them to the Greenville auction and sell them. Both of them... separately.
[Django looks at Old Man Carrucan with rage]
Old Man Carrucan : And this one... you will sell him cheap!
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Dr. King Schultz : Our mutual friend has a flair for the dramatic.
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Dr. King Schultz : Oh, Monsieur Candie, you can't imagine what it's like not to hear your mother tongue in four years.
Calvin Candie : Well hell, I can't imagine two weeks in Boston!
Stephen : [laughs out loud] "Two weeks in Boston!" Monsieur Candie, you a mess!
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Big Daddy : Uh, Betina?
Betina : Yessir, Big Daddy?
Big Daddy : Uh...
[to Schultz]
Big Daddy : What's your Jimmie's name again?
Dr. King Schultz : Django.
Big Daddy : Django!
[to Betina]
Big Daddy : Betina, sugar, could you take Django there and take him around the grounds here and show him all the pretty stuff?
Betina : As you please, Big Daddy!
Dr. King Schultz : Oh, Mr. Bennett, I must remind you, Django is a free man. He cannot be treated like a slave. He... within the boundaries of good taste, he must be treated as an extension of myself.
Big Daddy : Understood. Betina, sugar?
Betina : Yes'um?
Big Daddy : Django isn't a slave. Django is a free man. You understand?
[Betina pauses]
Big Daddy : You can't treat him like any of the other niggers around here, 'cause he ain't like any of the other nigger around here. Ya got it?
Betina : You want I should treat him like white folks?
Big Daddy : No, that's not what I said!
Betina : Then I don't know what you want, Big Daddy!
Big Daddy : Yes, I can see that.
[turns to Mammy]
Big Daddy : Uh, what's the name of that peckerwood boy from town that works with the glass? His momma work at the lumberyard...
Big Daddy's Mammy : Oh, you mean Jerry?
Big Daddy : That's the boy's name, Jerry!
[to Betina]
Big Daddy : You know Jerry, don't ya, sugar?
Betina : Yes'um, Big Daddy.
Big Daddy : Well, that's it then! You just treat him like you would Jerry!
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Big Daddy : It's against the law for niggers to ride horses in this territory.
Dr. King Schultz : This is my valet. My valet does not walk.
Big Daddy : I said, niggers on horses...
Dr. King Schultz : His name is Django. He's a free man. He can ride what he pleases!
Big Daddy : Not on my property. Not around my niggers he can't!
Dr. King Schultz : My good sir, perhaps we got off on the wrong boot. Allow me to unring this bell! My name is Dr. King Schultz, this is my valet, Django, and these are our horses, Tony and Fritz.
[Fritz the horse does his bow, making the slave girls giggle]
Dr. King Schultz : Mr. Bennett, I've been lead to believe you're a gentleman and a business man. And it is in these attributes we've ridden from Texas to Tennessee to parlay with you now. I wish to purchase one of your nigger gals!
Big Daddy : You and your Jimmie rode from Texas to Tennessee, to buy one of my nigger gals, no appointment, no nothin'?
Dr. King Schultz : Well, I'm afraid so!
Big Daddy : Well what if I say, I don't like you, or your fancy pants nigger, and I wouldn't sell you a tinkers damn! Now, what'cha got to say about that?
Dr. King Schultz : [Django looks at Schultz, Schultz looks at him and looks back up at Big Daddy] Mr. Bennett! If you are the business man I've been led to believe you to be, I have five thousand things I might say that could change your mind.
Big Daddy : [smiles] Well, c'mon inside and get yourself somethin' cool to drank!
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Dr. King Schultz : Auf Wiedersehen. Bullseye.
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Dr. King Schultz : [toasting their business transaction] Prost!
Calvin Candie : [toasting in kind] ... German.
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Dr. King Schultz : I must admit, I'm at a bit of a quandary when it comes to you. On one hand, I despise slavery. On the other hand, I need your help. If you're not in a position to refuse, all the better. So, for the time being, I'm gonna make this slavery malarkey work to my benefit. Still, having said that, I feel guilty...
[pause]
Dr. King Schultz : So, I would like the two of us to enter into an agreement.
[Schultz leans in on Django]
Dr. King Schultz : I'm looking for the Brittle brothers.
[Django stares at him]
Dr. King Schultz : However, at this endeavor, I'm at a slight disadvantage insofar as I don't know what they look like.
[pause]
Dr. King Schultz : But you do. Don't ya?
Django : [Django leans in on Schultz] Oh, I know what they look like, all right.
Dr. King Schultz : Good. So here's my agreement: You travel with me until we find them...
Django : [Django smiles] Where we goin'?
Dr. King Schultz : I hear at least two of them are overseeing up in Gatlinburg, but I don't know where. That means we visit every plantation in Gatlinburg till we find 'em. And when we find them, you point them out, and I kill them.
[Django smirks and nods]
Dr. King Schultz : You do that, I agree to give you your freedom; $25 per Brittle brother.
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Dr. King Schultz : Bonsoir ma petite femme noir.
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U.S. Marshall Gill Tatum : [the Marshall has arrived to confront Dr Schultz] This is U.S. Marshall Gill Tatum.
Dr. King Schultz : Wunderbar, Marshall! I have relieved myself of all weapons, and just as you have instructed, I am ready to step outside, with my hands raised above my head. I trust, as a representative of the criminal justice system of The United States of America, I shan't be shot down in the street, by either you or your deputies, before I've had my day in court.
U.S. Marshall Gill Tatum : You mean like you did our sheriff?
Dr. King Schultz : Yes, that's exactly what I mean! Do I have your word as a lawman, not to shoot me down like a dog in the street?
U.S. Marshall Gill Tatum : Well, as much as we'd all enjoy seein' somethin' like that, ain't nobody gonna cheat the hangman in my town.
Dr. King Schultz : Fair enough Marshall, here we come!
[to Django]
Dr. King Schultz : They're a little tense out there. So don't make any quick movements, and let me do the talking.
U.S. Marshall Gill Tatum : Come ahead. You unarmed?
Dr. King Schultz : Yes indeed we are. Marshall Tatum, may I address you and your deputies, and apparently the entire town of Daughtrey, as to the incident that just occurred?
U.S. Marshall Gill Tatum : Go on...
Dr. King Schultz : My name is Dr. King Schultz, and like yourself, marshall, I am a servant of the court. The man lying dead in the dirt, who the good people of Daughtrey saw fit to elect as their sheriff, who went by the name of Bill Sharp, is actually a wanted outlaw by the name of Willard Peck, with a price on his head of two hundred dollars. Now, that's two hundred dollars, dead or alive.
U.S. Marshall Gill Tatum : The hell you say!
Dr. King Schultz : I'm aware this is probably disconcerting news, but I'm willing to wager this man was elected sheriff sometime in the last two years? I know this because three years ago, he was rustling cattle from the B.C. Corrigan Cattle Company of Lubbock, Texas. Now this is a warrant, made out by circuit court Judge Henry Allen Laudermilk of Austin, Texas. You're encouraged to wire him. He'll back up who I am, and who your dear departed sheriff was.
[He and Django lower their arms]
Dr. King Schultz : In other words Marshall, you owe me two hundred dollars.
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Dr. King Schultz : [after Django has shot through a bottle] *That's* accurate.
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[in a flashback, when Django is doing target practice]
Dr. King Schultz : Do you know what they're going to call you? The "Fastest Gun in the South".
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Dr. King Schultz : I can't express the joy I felt conversing in my mother tongue. And Hildi is a charming conversation companion.
Calvin Candie : Well, be careful now, Dr. Schultz. You might have caught yourself a little dose of nigger love. Nigger love's a powerful emotion, boy. It's like a pool of black tar. Once it catches your ass, your caught.
Stephen : Yessir, you stuck!
Lara Lee Candie-Fitzwilly : I don't know, doctor. You can lay on all the German sweet talk you want, but it looks like this pony's got big eyes for Django.
Dr. King Schultz : Well, naturally, it is the soaring eagle that attracts her attention, not the plucked chicken.
-
Dr. King Schultz : [Turns to the four remaining slaves] Now, as to you poor devils. So as I see it, when it comes to the subject of what to do next, you gentlemen have two choices. One: once I'm gone, you could lift that beast off the remaining Speck, then carry him to the nearest town; which would be at least 37 miles back the way you came. Or two: you could unshackle yourselves, take that rifle, put a bullet in his head, bury the two of them deep, and then make your way to a more enlightened area of this country. The choice is yours.
[Starts to ride off but stops to talk to the slaves again]
Dr. King Schultz : Oh! And on the off chance there are any astronomy aficionados amongst you, the North Star is that one. Tata!
[Dr. Shultz rides away with his horse and wagon; Django follows him on horseback but keeps watch of what the four other slaves do to Dicky Speck]
Dicky Speck : [the slaves watch both Shultz and Django walk away and all turn to Dicky Speck, who is lying on the ground wounded] Now, wait a minute, fellas! Let's talk about this!
[the black men start approaching him aggressively. One of the men drops the lantern; the slaves each take off their blankets and a couple of them pick up sticks]
Dicky Speck : You gotta be reasonable in a situation like this!
[the slaves continue walking towards him, not saying a word. The man on the far right holds a rifle. Django watches and observes all of this]
Dicky Speck : I'm not a bad guy, I'm just doing my job! Blueberry, didn't I give you my last apple? Tell you what, boys, take me to the doc in El Paso, and I'll get you your freedom.
[We hear the rifle cocking]
Dicky Speck : No... wait!
[the slaves shoot and kill Dicky Speck]
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Dr. King Schultz : [Big Daddy approaches with a mob of other people to confront Schultz and Django after they killed the Brittle brothers] Everybody calm down, we mean no one else any harm!
Big Daddy : Who are you two jokers?
Dr. King Schultz : I am Dr. King Schultz, a legal representative of the criminal justice system of the United States of America. The man to my left is Django Freeman, he's my deputy. In my pocket is a warrant signed by circuit court judge Henry Allen Laudermilk of Austin, Texas, for the arrest and capture, dead or alive, of John Brittle, Ellis Brittle, and Roger Brittle...
Django : They were going by the name of "Shaffer."
Dr. King Schultz : You know them by the name "Shaffer," but the butchers real names were Brittle. These are wanted men; the law wants them for murder. I reiterate, this warrant states "dead or alive." When Django and myself executed these men on sight, we were operating within our legal boundaries. Now, I realize passions are high, but I must warn you, the penalty for taking deadly force against a officer of the court in the performance of his duty is, you will be hung by the neck until you are dead.
Dr. King Schultz : [pause] May I please remove the warrant from my pocket so you may examine it?
Big Daddy : [Resting his rifle on his shoulder] Gimme.
Dr. King Schultz : Satisfied? May I have that back?
Big Daddy : Get off my land!
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Calvin Candie : You do not have anything to drink. Can I get you a tasty refreshment?
Dr. King Schultz : Yes! I'll have a beer.
Calvin Candie : Wunderbar. Roscoe, a beer for the man with the beard and I will have a Polynesian Pearl Diver - do not spare the run.
-
[Django is hesitating to kill Smitty Bacall]
Dr. King Schultz : [teasing] Ooh. What happened to Mister "I Wanna Shoot White Folks For Money"?
Django : His son's with him.
Dr. King Schultz : Well, good. He'll have a loved one with him. Maybe even share a last word. That's better than most of them get. Damn sight better than he deserves.
[Django still hesitates]
Dr. King Schultz : Put down the rifle.
[Django cocks back the safety and puts the rifle down]
Dr. King Schultz : Don't worry, I'm not mad at you. Let's take out Smitty Bacall's handbill.
[hands it to Django]
Dr. King Schultz : Now, read it out loud. Consider that today's lesson.
Django : [stumbles while reading] "Wanted... dead or alive. Smitty Bacall and the Smitty Bacall G..."
Dr. King Schultz : Gang.
Django : "Gang. For murder and... s-stagecoach ro... robbery. Seven zero-zero-zero..."
Dr. King Schultz : Seven thousand.
Django : Seven...?
Dr. King Schultz : Thousand.
Django : "Seven thousand... dollars for Smitty Bacall, one thousand, and five hundred dollars for each of his... gang m..."
Dr. King Schultz : Mem...?
Django : "Members. Known members of the Smitty Bacall Gang are as follas..."
Dr. King Schultz : Follows.
Django : "Follows. Dandy Michaels, Gerald Nash and..."
Dr. King Schultz : [finishes for him] Crazy Craig Koons.
[points to the portrait on the poster]
Dr. King Schultz : *That* is who Smitty Bacall is. If Smitty Bacall wanted to start a farm at 22, they would never have printed that.
[takes back the handbill]
Dr. King Schultz : But Smitty Bacall wanted to rob stagecoaches, and he didn't mind killing people to do it. Do you want to save your wife by doing what I do? This is what I do. I kill people and sell their corpses for cash. This corpse is worth seven thousand dollars. Now, quit your pussyfooting and shoot him.
[Django shoots Smitty. His son laughs, thinking it a joke]
Smitty's Son : Pa? Pa!
[runs to his father's body]
Dr. King Schultz : Here. You need to keep this Smitty Bacall handbill.
Django : Why?
Dr. King Schultz : It's good luck. You always keep the handbill of your first bounty.
-
Dr. King Schultz : Good morning, inn keeper. Two beers for two weary travelers!
Innkeeper : [while busy fixing a lamp bulb in the diner] Ah, it's still a bit early. We won't be open for another hour. By then, we'll be servin' breakfast-
[the innkeeper turns around and sees Schultz with Django; he gasps frantically]
Innkeeper : Whoa, whoa, WHOA, WHOA!
[to Django]
Innkeeper : What the hell you think you're doing, boy?
[to Schultz]
Innkeeper : Get that nigger outta here!
[the innkeeper is then shown running outside]
Innkeeper : Help! HELP!
Dr. King Schultz : [Schultz runs after him] Innkeeper... innkeeper! Remember, get the sheriff, not the marshal!
Innkeeper : [as he is running through the town] Sheriff! Help!
Dr. King Schultz : [Schultz returns to the inn and shrugs to Django] Alas! Now we must act as our own bartender. Sit down, my boy.
[Django sits at the table while Schultz goes to the bar to prepare two glasses of beer]
-
Django : [as Schultz prepares to pour the beer] What kind of dentist are you?
Dr. King Schultz : [smiles] Ha!
[Schultz fills the beer glasses from the tap]
Dr. King Schultz : Despite that cart, I haven't practiced dentistry in five years. But these days, I practice a new profession...
[Schultz grabs the glasses filled with beer and gives a drink to Django]
Dr. King Schultz : Bounty hunter.
[Schultz sits down with his own glass]
Dr. King Schultz : Do you know what a bounty hunter is?
Django : No.
Dr. King Schultz : Well, the way the slave trade deals in human lives for cash, a bounty hunter deals in corpses.
[Schultz clinks his beer glass to Django's]
Dr. King Schultz : Prost!
[pause]
Dr. King Schultz : The state places a bounty on a man's head. I track that man, I find that man, I kill that man.
[pause]
Dr. King Schultz : After I've killed him, I transport that man's corpse back to the authorities. Sometimes that's easier said than done. I show that corpse to the authorities, proving yes, indeed, I truly have killed him, at which point the authorities pay me the bounty. So, like slavery, it's a flesh for cash business.
-
[repeated line]
Dr. King Schultz : You poor devils.
-
Django : Why you care what happens to me? Why you care if I find my wife?
Dr. King Schultz : Well frankly, I've never given anybody their freedom before. And now that I have, I feel vaguely responsible for you. Plus, when a German meets a real life Sigfried, that's kind of a big deal. As a German, I'm obliged to help you on your quest to rescue your beloved Broomhilda.
-
Dr. King Schultz : What's your name?
Django : Django.
Dr. King Schultz : Then you're exactly the one I'm looking for.
-
Dr. King Schultz : He owns the fourth biggest cotton planation in Mississippi: Candyland.
Django : Candyland?
Dr. King Schultz : Oh, so you've heard of it?
Django : Ain't no slave ain't heard of Candyland.
-
Django : So, do we offer to buy her?
Dr. King Schultz : So, say a man wants to buy a horse - *needs* to buy a horse. He walks up to the farmer's farm. He knocks on the farmer's door and asks the farmer to buy his horse. And you know what the farmer says? The farmer says: no.
Django : Well, I say, fuck that farmer and I steal that horse.
Dr. King Schultz : Fair enough. But, now you're a horse thief and they hang horse thieves. Not to mention the horse goes back to his original owner because the horse is still his property. We need her *and* we need a bill of sale.
Django : Well, if we ain't gonna try to buy her, how we gonna git her?
Dr. King Schultz : May I offer an alternative plan of action?
-
Dr. King Schultz : Don't get so carried away with your retribution. You'll lose sight of why we're here.
Django : You think I lost sight of that?
Dr. King Schultz : Yes, I do! Stop antagonizing Candie. You're going to blow this whole charade or, more than likely, get us both killed. And I, for one, don't intend to die in Chi-cka-saw County, Mississippi, USA.
-
Django : You want me to play a black slaver? Ain't nothin' lower than the black slaver. A black slaver is lower than the head house nigga, and buddy, that's pretty fuckin' low.
Dr. King Schultz : Then play him that way! Give me *your* black slaver.
-
Dr. King Schultz : Why is he called Eskimo Joe?
Calvin Candie : You never know how these nigger nicknames get started. His name was Joe. Maybe one day he said he was cold? Who knows?
-
Dr. King Schultz : What's everybody starring at?
Django : They ain't never seen no nigger on a horse before.
-
Dr. King Schultz : [to Calvin Candie] Mr. Candie... normally, I would say auf wiedersehen. But since what auf wiedersehen actually means is till I see you again... and since I never wish to see you again, to you, sir... I say, goodbye.
[turns around and faces Django]
Dr. King Schultz : Let's go.
-
Dr. King Schultz : Mr. Speck, I'm afraid I'll require a bill of sale. Do you have one?
Dicky Speck : You go to Hell, Dentist!
-
Calvin Candie : Dr. Shultz, when you were alone with Hildi, did you just speak German or did you get to take her clothes off?
Dr. King Schultz : No, we just talked.
Calvin Candie : So, you haven't seen her back?
Dr. King Schultz : I haven't...
Calvin Candie : No. No, no. Stephen's right. You might find this interesting. Hildi, go on take off your dress, show Dr. Schultz your back here. Go on.
Lara Lee Candie-Fitzwilly : Calvin, I just got her all dressed up and looking nice.
Calvin Candie : But Lara Lee, Dr. Schultz is from Dusseldorf, they don't got niggers there. He's a man of medicine! I'm sure it would fascinate him, the niggers endurance for pain. These niggers are tough, Dr. Schultz, no doubt about it. Hildi's got somethin' like four lashes on her back. If Lara Lee just get one, she'd lose her goddamn mind! Look at that Doctor. It's like a painting. Look at that.
Lara Lee Candie-Fitzwilly : Calvin! Ain't no one wanna see her whipped up back.
Lara Lee Candie-Fitzwilly : Fine. Fine, fine, fine, fine. After dinner then, Stephen. After dinner. During the brandies, gentlemen.
-
Dr. King Schultz : Can you convincingly masquerade as someone who's an expert on Mandingo fighting?
-
Django : What you said was that, "This is my world. In my world you gotta get dirty." So, that's what I'm doin'. I'm gittin' dirty.
Dr. King Schultz : Well, you're paraphrasing a tad, but, that was the general gist of it.
-
Dr. King Schultz : Oh, Monsieur Candie, about that matter about the nigger girl we were talking about?
Calvin Candie : Nigger gal?
Dr. King Schultz : I believe you mentioned she spoke German?
Calvin Candie : Ah, yes, Hildi, what about her?
Dr. King Schultz : Do you think before the demonstration you could send her to my room?
Calvin Candie : You little Dickens, you. I don't see why not.
-
Dr. King Schultz : Can you please stop playing Beethoven?
