- Lilith: [in a one-piece swimsuit and sarong with a flower in her hair and a Hawaiian tropical drink in her hand] Aloha! I see you've met Rachel Worth. Poor thing. Can you believe it's her wedding day? Certainly not a very auspicious start. A bride needs something borrowed, something blue, but certainly not something dead. I guess the silver lining in all of this is the corpse is not the man she's planning to marry. But with her ceremony on a private beach near Waikiki looming in six hours, she best fix this little hiccup that's threatening her big day.
- [puts down her drink and walks up the steps to the top of a diving rock overlooking a swimming pool]
- Lilith: Otherwise, there could very well be a whole new meaning to the phrase, "Till death do us part".
- [takes off her sarong, dives into the water and swims]
- Lilith: [still in her one-piece swimsuit and refreshed from swimming, her hair wet and her hand gently stroking the water] It's been said it's bad luck for a bride and groom to see each other before the wedding. Although, after the day they've had, I don't blame Rachel or Cam for throwing caution to the wind. As for lessons learned, it's an age-old question for women: Do you marry for love or for money?
- [chuckles]
- Lilith: Luckily, though, for Rachel Worth, today, she doesn't have to choose. Mahalo.
- Rachel: Kim. Oh, my God. It was you. You hired the stripper. And you made my first drink. You spiked it, which is why I was so out of it and can't remember anything! And someone would've had to record it. You actually made moans to make it look like it was actually happening, like I was awake and I was enjoying it? And you were gonna to email it to Cam so he'd call off the wedding. And you would be next in line for the trust fund.
- Cam: Kim, did you really murder this poor guy?
- Kim: Poor guy? Poor guy? Oh, come on, Cam. Get off your high horse. Poor guy. He was just some sleazy stripper. Anyways, it was his own fault. No one was supposed to get hurt. But the bastard got greedy. He demanded half of the money, threatened to expose me to you and Rachel. So I just agreed to shut him up. But come on. I wasn't just gonna hand over $5 million to some lame fireman. So I made him the special cocktail that I made Rachel, and I kept him busy until it took effect. And I could handle this problem once and for all. But it turned out to be a much better plan than I anticipated. Because cheating is one thing, but accidentally killing a trick while making love the night before your wedding? Well, there's just no way that Cam was ever gonna say "I do". Not to her.
- Rachel: No wonder you wanted to call the cops! You knew it looked bad for me.
- Kim: I did what I had to do! I mean, we're talking $10 million here! It's not fair! Okay? I was the good girl! I went to Nana's house every Sunday! I remembered her birthdays; he didn't! I was the one that got straight A's! I was the good girl! But the bitch left it all to him! Thought he could change! But it wasn't the money that changed him, Rachel. It was you.
- Rachel: Your little Frederick's of Hollywood number - was it preshrunk?
- Kim: No.
- [Rachel picks up a lemonade pitcher and dumps lemonade on Kim's head]
- Rachel: Worst maid of honor ever.
- Rachel: We have to postpone the wedding.
- Cam: No.
- Rachel: Cam, we have no choice.
- Cam: We're doing it. Just as we planned. Today.
- Rachel: Why?
- Cam: Because I have to be married by the time I'm 30.
- Rachel: Sweetie, no, you don't.
- Cam: When my grandmother died, she left me a $10 million trust fund. But there was a catch. She stipulated that I have to be married by my 30th birthday or I don't get the money.
- Rachel: But why would she do something like that?
- Cam: Gram was around long enough to see me go through my wild period. Let's just say she didn't exactly approve. She wanted me to settle down and make something of myself, which I did. Just after, she was gone. But there's still that clause in the will that I need to adhere to.
- Rachel: Why didn't you tell me?
- Cam: I was going to. I just... I didn't want you to think I was marrying you just so I can get my hands on the money. I'm marrying you because I love you, Rachel.
- Sharon: Okay, that's really sweet, but what I wanna know is, what happens to the money if you don't get married?
- [Aaron has just thrown Sharon into the swimming pool and Daphne just witnessed what happened]
- Daphne: Hey! Come on now!
- Sharon: [getting very angry and furious] Oh, you stupid idiot!
- Daphne: I'd watch out for Sharon. She caught her last boyfriend cheating, took a crowbar to his head. Just now starting to remember his name.
- Sharon: Oh, I'm gonna kill you! You're such an idiot!
- Aaron: If the dude's got no memory of dating that bitch, he's a lucky man.
- Sharon: Stupid idiot! I'm really gonna kill you!