- Mike Biggs: [to another fan at a Cubs game while Molly is crying due to missing her dad] She's a little upset. She thought it was bobble head day.
- Mike Biggs: Look at me, Carl. It's the 9th inning and I have not had *one* hotdog!
- Vendor #2: You want everything on it, big guy?
- Mike Biggs: Walk away! Walk away! Walk away!