Lords of London (2014) User Reviews

Not as advertised 2/10

[leonblackwood · 2/10 · 12 January 2014]

Lords Of London (2014)

Plot: Unconventional British gangster movie directed by Antonio Simoncini. London gangster Tony Lord (Glen Murphy) is forced to reflect on his past misdeeds when he is transported back to 1950s Italy, where his mother and father originally met and fell in love. Knowing the damaging nature of his father (Christopher Hatherall)'s future wrongdoings, Tony takes the opportunity to stop his mother (Serena Iansiti) from leaving Italy with him and changes the course of history as a result...

Review: It really gets on my nerves when people put a picture on poster to promote a movie, which has totally nothing to do with the film. Ray Winstone is only in a couple of scenes, and he doesn't hold a gun in none of them. Also the whole film is set in Italy so I don't know why they changed the title from Lost in Italy, which was more appropriate, to Lords Of London. Anyway, I found the movie to be quite boring and sketchy. It's one of those films which go back and forth in time, which I hate, and it doesn't really make much sense. After watching the guy wall around the town over and over again, without anyone actually noticing him, I just got bored of the whole thing and I lost interest. The storyline needed a lot more work, but the actors weren't that bad. Personally I thought that the film was a massive disappointment and I was totally misled by the poster.

Round-Up: Ray Winstone is really good when he is playing the old swearing, angry, cockney gangster roles, but he was wasted in this movie. He should have played the lead. I liked the old Italian guy, who brought some light to the movie, but the storyline was appalling. I think that I'm right by thinking that the main character was in limbo, but I don't know why the director had to make the whole think so complicated. If he was trying to be clever with the storyline, then he done a really bad job. Anyway, that aside, the music seemed like it was done on someone's phone, which does start to become a bit tedious whilst watching the film, and the ending could have explained what the hell was you watching the last hour and a half.

Budget: $3.4million Worldwide Gross: N/A

I recommend this movie to people who are into there flashback and forth type of movies about a guy who wakes up in Italy. 2/10

His Italian wasn't that good

[nogodnomasters · 4/10 · 15 January 2018]

Tony Lord (Glen Murphy) is lying in a pool of blood in the first scene. The next thing you know he is in Italy, covered with blood. He enters a small village which we quickly figure out is an existentialist setting. Tony meets Francesco (Giovanni Capalbo) the only man in the village that will talk to him. Francesco is concerned about his daughter (Serena Iansiti) running off with an Englishman (Christopher Hatherall) who is a bad seed. Tony has flashbacks to his own life both as a child and an adult. He sees the negativity in his life and must come to terms with the idea that his mother would have been better off had she stayed in Italy.

The film was boring. There wasn't much action, just low grade drama. It seemed that Tony couldn't recognize his own parents as youths which added to the confusion of the story. For those who expect to see a good crime drama need to look elsewhere. This is more like an art film by people who don't know how to do art films.

Lords of Marketing

[artiew99 · 3/10 · 24 July 2014]

Ray Winston has no place either on the cover or even in the main billing for this film. The clots who decided to re-brand 'Lost in Italy' really need to take a good long look at themselves, but my guess is that marketing types care about one precisely one thing - in that sense, I believe they are as amoral as Winstone's character (young or old - he's the same one-dimensional thug with a massive chip on his shoulder).

I have no problem with an Italian director making an existentialist film set in a picture-perfect Italian village, but a photo of said village on the cover with Tony (Glen Murphy) front and center would have sold roughly 3 copies outside the director's home town. Any suggestion that the plot twist somehow makes this film work just doesn't do it for me, and I'm one of those folk who fervently wishes his childhood could have been different . Not sure why Winstone even took this role - does he need the money that badly ? I gave it 3 for the village but I really cant recommend this to anyone who wants the style of film depicted on the cover of the DVD.

Terrible movie

[luiser-898-616536 · 1/10 · 15 January 2014]

Wow. This was one of the worst movies I've ever seen. Basically you figure out the whole story within the first 10 minutes of the movie (not kidding) and then spend the rest of this 90 minute snooze fest waiting for the main character to figure it out as well.

Main characters that behave unbelievably stupid and take painfully long to figure out the obvious are nothing new, but this one might seriously be a contender for worst of all time. To add insult to injury, the director probably thinks his audience is equally retarded, as the same hints at the big mystic truth get repeated over and over again in more and more obvious fashion until even a braindead monkey would understand what its all about. Since that is basically the whole film, you are looking at 90 minutes of countless repetitions of the same scenes in minor variations.

This wouldn't be as bad as it is, if these scenes weren't completely boring and meaningless once there is no mystery left which they help to uncover (which again, you basically have it all figured out 10 minutes into the movie, guaranteed!) I really wonder how this could win awards. Also this has not much to do with a Gangster film, the title poster is VERY misleading. This is my first review, I actually made an account just to warn people of this extremely bad movie.

Doesn't do what it says on the tin

[jonny-666 · 1/10 · 19 January 2014]

Totally misleading title and description.If,like me,you see Ray Winstone and like the sound of the title do yourself a huge favour and steer well clear of this movie.It thinks it's very clever but it's far from it.Actually now that I'm sitting here about to describe how bad it is,words fail me so I'm going to recommend that you watch it then you can share my pain.It's about 90 minutes of your life that you will never ever,ever get back.The acting I can't fault and the setting is lovely but nothing can save this movie.Slow and boringly paced,lack of direction,decent idea but badly executed.I could go on but I have stuff to do for the next couple of days.

Lord of Mercy!

[Eggenberg · 1/10 · 22 February 2014]

Well, Lawwds of Lahndaan... It's been on my "What's this one all about?" scroll-past list for a while (other, better fodder seems to have always presented itself). As nothing else caught my eye tonight I decided to feed my shameful desire and watch a bit of "Fawh Sevin Free Sevin Carlin!" Ray Winston malarkey. Yeah! 'Ave it!

Oh foolish me!

From hereon in, instead of typing out Lords of London I'll refer to it as LoL. To me that's acronym's fitting.

So, LoL. I think it's other name is Lords of London (Lost in Italy) but this additional part of the film's title seems to have become... lost. Hopefully without giving away the big surprise of the film I think "Lost".... in Italy would have worked better because in a right cackhanded way that's what this film's trying to be - with ragou! You'll probably cotton on to what this mish-mash of a title is all about by the - thankfully early - scene in which he encounters a living, breathing person for the first time. To be clear I'm not saying that to sound like a right Clever Dick, it's just it's as plain as the nose on your face what's happened, what's happening and what's going to happen. Now this isn't necessarily a bad thing with a movie - that "knowing what's going" - however with this film I found myself not caring after about 30 minutes in.

You have the ubiquitous Ray Winston roaring "Faaahki*g Caaa**!" etc. and the odd scenes of uber-violence (some with Big Ray in 'em!) by way of flashbacks slung in usually when the main character (played not by Big Ray but by Glen Murphy) has a bit of a fuzzy moment as he's lurching around a small, Italian town seemingly oblivious to what's going on even though I was pretty damn convinced that if I was him I'd have worked it out ages ago, stopped running about the place and sat myself down for a meal and a bottle of wine at the local taverna. Other than that it's pretty much Lost in Lombardy and you're wishing you'd gone to bed instead.

The acting is, on the whole, pretty strained and unconvincing (the scene featuring the dance at the village hall or whatever it is - god help me! If ever I've prayed hard for a Godfather style invasion of gunmen it was at that point). Ray Winston's Ray Winston (however briefly) - he snarls about for a bit doing the Winston thing. Glen Murphy (Who's 'e?) looks confused and in need of a sit down. The rest of the cast were there - one point for merit.

I got two things from this film: a desire for it to be over soon was the main thing but the camera work in the Italian town was a saving grace making it look like a nice place to spend a "Love's First Bloom Rekindled" short-break with my wife. We like Italian food and rustic European towns. Other than that an entirely dull and forgettable film that left me compelled to write my first ever review in the hope I can reach out and save at least one person from repeating my folly.

In my best Cockney accent: do y'self a fayvah, sunshine an' givv this wahhn a miss - it's a load of old Tom Tit!

just awful

[peter-martin-899-161468 · 1/10 · 17 January 2014]

I've only just registered on IMDb so that I could comment on this movie. A very misleading video cover, and an absolute rubbish movie. Honestly it would be impossible to write a spoiler for this movie, it is just so awful. It is obvious from the get go that the guy is dead and this is some sort of spaghetti western style morality play. The acting is very poor and is reminiscent of the made for late night TV films pumped out of British budget studios during the 1960s and 70s. I still remember Ray in Sexy Beast - great film. When I saw Ray on the cover I thought "Hell Yeah - this'll be good". It was very dishonest marketing and a thorough waste of my time and money. I read one or two good reviews of this movie and I can only assume that those reviewers are either bots or extremely bored and far too easily pleased.

What was that all about

[garethflemington · 1/10 · 26 January 2014]

Probably the worst movie I have seen in the last 12 months. Haven't seen Glen Murphy since London's Burning, and all he seem to do is run about. Ray Winstone, I had a bet with myself as to how long it would take before he swore, I think it was 30 seconds, and so it continued throughout the movie. I do wonder how much it affects young children who have a part in this sort of movie. I note that the child in the movie surname was Murphy, is he the son of Glen. Mr Murphy was also one of the Producers of the movie and I'm sure his time, money and effort could have been spent on a movie worthy of his talent. It would seem from a previous reviewer that this movie has been released on DVD save your money.

Where are the lords

[ArchieIsCool · 1/10 · 17 August 2014]

As usual I saw Ray Winstone and thought oh sounds a good film, boy was I wrong Most of her film is set in Italy following Glen Murphy's character walking about fields and tight streets meeting an Italian cafe owner and getting involved in his granddaughters English boyfriend meetings but no one really sees him only this old man, Ray plays Glens dad and is a nasty piece of work this is in flashbacks .

I couldn't make sense of this film it was too boring but I think Glen's character is actually dead and that's why no one sees him except the old man who I think is his grandad or great grandad I don't know blooming awful and a waste of time.

Good for feeding cats.

[jordanbrownless · 1/10 · 17 February 2019]

Waste of time. 1 star is generous. Certified cat meat hence the title of my review.

Sold down the river with the case of the DVD.

Surprisingly good

[brightoncityboxingclub · 8/10 · 11 January 2014]

Picked this up on DVD cheaply as a new release so wasn't expecting much, maybe a low grade gangster flick, but it is a well put together and thought out film, with good performances and some very clever plotting.

Not really a gangster film in the true sense of the genre, excellent twist and good idea from Glen Murphy.

Winstone is at his snarling malevolent best, obviously doing friend Murphy a favour in appearing but gives a strong performance as an unlikeable bully.

Well worth a watch, one of the best thought out and most original films I've seen in a while

Lavazza Coffee in a Chipped Nescafe Mug

[StationeryExplorer · 7/10 · 11 July 2014]

When I checked-in to this movie, I was very disappointed to see the low score. Ten minutes in, I realised the problem: you see Big Ray and Fireman Murphy in the credits and you want to see mugs getting a slap for taking liberties. That doesn't really happen, so anyone looking for that type of movie will be disappointed.

What does happen is that a couple of cockneys get metaphysical on the collective backsides of the audience and pull off something worthwhile. It's not the best movie you'll ever see, in fact it's pretty easy to spot how it's going to play out from the start, but if you send your expectations down the nuclear sub (pub) and put your plates (feet) up with a bowl of earwax (snacks), you could probably persuade 'er indoors (betrothed / spouse / partner) to watch it with you.

Absolute rubbish

[twhitnall · 1/10 · 2 July 2022]

Just wasted 90 minutes of my life that I'll never get back. Probably the worst film I have ever seen, absolute rubbish. Big fan of Ray Winstone, but what was he thinking, getting involved with this garbage?

The plot is so weak it doesnt stand up, I sussed it when Tony Lord woke up in a derelict building..... Who was the girl that shot Mr Lord at the end? Disjoined, weak waste of time, if I could give it 0 stars I would.

Should've been banned too violent

[Paulldavidson · 1/10 · 18 July 2020]

This film should've been banned it contains strong torture by a gangster who is abusive to his wife and child its not a film i would watch again infact it made me annoyed

W should be renamed

[richardstirling · 5/10 · 26 September 2020]

Film is ok at least it's not another run of the mill Gangster film. Not sure why a film that is 90% set in a small Italian village should be called Lords of London! Glen Murphy is so similar to Ray Winston it's easy to believe they are related! Story is slow and not that exiting and the violence it's at times disturbing! Glen Murphy is good so still worth a watch.

Serena

[graham_robertson · 2/10 · 21 March 2024]

The idea is okay but is not developed and the movie is way too short. I was waiting for something to develop and something to happen but it never did. I think the plot and action could have been really fitted into 30 minutes rather than one hour and 30 minutes. The opening scene does not make a lot of sense and we are left wondering why the protagonist is left where he is in a house above a village in Italy, and why he is left there?

Serena Iansitti is the only reason I watched this forgetable film and what a wonderful reason it is. She is imo the most beautiful woman in the world. She featured in the television series Montalbano however I haven't seen her in any other film unfortunately, much as I would love to.

What a waste

[marcbolton · 1/10 · 5 January 2016]

A waste of money making it

A waste of time watching it

A waste of actors being in it

A waste of paper for the script

A waste of a beautiful location

In every way it's possible for a film to fail, this film manages it. The dialogue is terrible, the characters imbecilic, the story transparent, the pace turgid, the music intrusive, the slow zooms incessant, the ending disappointing and the cover picture deceiving.

If you're looking for an enjoyable British gangster movie, or a thought provoking drama, this isn't it. It's trying to be something it's not, punching waaay above its weight, and missing the mark every step of the way.

SLOW ZOOMS AND LINGERING SHOTS ARE NOT ART!!

Anybody who gives this film a rating above a 3 is either in need of seeing a lot more films or a plant. I'm only giving it a 1 because Ray's in it. If he'd been playing the main character it might have rated a 2 or 3, but as it stands, a 1 is all this film is worth.

Be nice to yourself and avoid.

Kinda rubbish

[robertmcwhirter · 1/10 · 3 November 2022]

Spoiler alert, Ray Winstone plays the part of a London gangster. I was confused a lot during this film. As I tend to watch movies when I'm in bed, I fell asleep a few times and would wake up and have to find were I left off. As it turns out it wasn't worth the effort, this was a boring film trying to be clever. It didn't succeed. If a film holds my attention I'll stay awake, unfortunately this one didn't. Although the acting was good I don't know what could've been done to make the film better as the story and the way it was told was dire. Also the music didn't help the situation. So basically don't waste your time with this one.

not what you think

[MikesIDhasbeentaken · 3/10 · 29 September 2015]

agree with others who have said the cover for this movie is misleading,

it's not about ray Winstone being a London gangster, far from it, it's about an apparent gangster figuring out why he's woken up in Italy.

if he is a tough gangster, why doesn't he even try to change things that are happening? he does''t even try to do anything the whole movie.

lot's of reviews have said it's obvious what's going on, but it's lost on me, i don't think even think the people that made this know exactly what happened, it certainly doesn't seem like they tried to make it make any sense of any kind.

Not the worst movie ever though, and it had it's moments, although anyone going into it wanting to watch The Business or Sexy Beast will defiantly be disappointed

Misleading cover

[mick120359 · 2/10 · 28 May 2022]

OMG what a strange film. I'll give it some credit, it's an interesting idea, but it should have been advertised in a different way.

The cover and write up on this film lead you to believe that it's another classic Ray Winston gangster film but without giving to much away, IT'S NOT.

Yes there are some parts that you would expect but most of it is chit chat.

My recommendation is don't bother with this one.

Excellent if unusual film

[jayneflakes · 9/10 · 3 April 2014]

I saw this movie as a DVD that I picked up in a sale basket and to be honest I did not expect much given the price but being fond of Winstone, I thought that for three pounds I could not lose out. This has probably been one of the better choices I have made for a while, because while the film at first confuses the viewer, the tone changes as a dark bleak certainty is more than hinted at.

Ray Winstone is as always powerful, if not utterly terrifying, the implication that his character is capable of "things other men are not" is brutally laid out in this tragically dark movie about family.

Although the story arc becomes quickly apparent to a switched on viewer, the fear of the brutality that some of the characters can unleash makes viewing occasionally an uncomfortable experience, but persevere through this because the end is most unexpected.

Imaginative, at times unsettling

[rumblestrom · 8/10 · 26 February 2016]

I caught this film on late night TV by chance, and it had quite an impact on me. Clearly, some of the other reviewers were looking for unstinting, hardcore violence. There is violence, but the menace is just as, if not more powerful.

Some scenes are quite grim and unsettling, while the contrast in the portrayal of relationships couldn't be more stark, to good effect.

The acting is believable and drew me in right up to the end. Yes, it was clear to me what was happening, but that's because I was watching a film. You wouldn't find it so easy to process if this was actually your life, which doesn't seem to have occurred to the film's detractors.

You need to have a bit of an imagination to appreciate this film. If you're only interested in torture and mayhem, look elsewhere.

Superb film.

[concierge-932-781144 · 9/10 · 24 February 2014]

What a great film this is, superb acting by everyone, this is what watching films is all about, great story, imaginative filming, wonderful acting all round, it's very difficult to find a better actor than Ray winstone, brilliant cast, fab storyline, all the actors are on top form, it's one of those films you can get your teeth into, definitely worth buying, comes over as a very real film, there is not enough films like this made these days. Can't see why some people seem to have a problem with this film, the editing, production and directing are all first class, it's a film that makes you think, surely it can't get any better than this, keep your eyes open for more films that include this cast, you will not go wrong.

Should of won Oscars a modern masterpiece!!!

[howardlees · 10/10 · 9 March 2021]

Award winning performances by all the actors, writing was genius, Producer well he was another level and the director I can only say "BRAVO!!!" this film should have a extra star section just made for it. Made Shakespeares work look below average!!!.