- Kelly Erin Hannon: [after pulling her car up] Get in, quick!
- Michael Scott: Why quick?
- Kelly Erin Hannon: So it's faster!
- Pam Beesly: Cece's getting christened today.
- Jim Halpert: Big day.
- Pam Beesly: Everyone from work is here. We weren't planning on that.
- Jim Halpert: Nope.
- Pam Beesly: I know a lot of us have been feeling under the weather lately. It's that time of year. And, according to a study done by the University of Arizona, they discovered that your keyboards have hundreds of times more bacteria per square inch than a toilet seat.
- Kelly Erin Hannon: I heard your mama has more bacteria per square inch than a toilet seat.
- Michael Scott: That's true. That's true. I dated her mama. And you know what...?
- Jim Halpert: Stop.
- Pam Beesly: I'm going to set up hand-sanitizing stations around the office.
- Dwight Schrute: No. No. No. They will cost you your life.
- Jim Halpert: Elaborate.
- Dwight Schrute: The worst thing you can do for your immune system is to coddle it. They need to fight their own battles. If Sabre really cared about our well-being, they would set up hand-desanitizing stations. A simple bowl at every juncture filled with dirt, vomit, fecal matter.
- Pam Beesly: I'm not- I'm not going to do that.
- Dwight Schrute: Exposing yourself to germs is the best way to make yourself stronger.
- Jim Halpert: So by that rationale, if I had to sneeze, I should just sneeze on you.
- Dwight Schrute: Yes. I would welcome it.
- Jim Halpert: [Sneezes on Dwight] You're welcome.
- Ryan Howard: For all their genorosity of spirit they password protect their wireless?
- Kelly Kapoor: Try 'Jesus'.
- Dwight Schrute: Opus Dei.
- Minister Gail: Today we also say goodbye to our young adult ministry. They're leaving for 3 months to build a school for the village of Quimixto in Cabo Corrientes, Mexico.
- Ryan Howard: I've heard of that place. If you go to Cabo San Lucas, all the prostitutes are from Cabo Corrientes.
- Young Adult Ministry Deserter: [getting off the bus after Michael and Andy] Wait for me... Don't say anything to my parents.