- Castiel: [while watching porn] That's very complex
- Dean Winchester: M-hm
- Castiel: If the pizzaman truly loves this babysitter, why does he keep slapping her rear?
- [pauses]
- Castiel: Perhaps she's done something wrong.
- Dean Winchester: You're watching porn? Why?
- Castiel: It was there.
- Dean Winchester: You don't watch porn in a room full of dudes. And... you don't talk about it. Just turn it off.
- Castiel: [Looks between his legs]
- Dean Winchester: Oh, now he's got a boner
- Meg: I'll hold off the dogs.
- Dean Winchester: Well, how are you gonna do that exactl - -
- [Meg pulls Castiel into a kiss and reaches into his trench coat. They pull apart, and Castiel spins Meg around, pushes her against the wall, and kisses her again]
- Meg: [Almost dreamily] What was that?
- Castiel: [Looks at Dean and Sam, who are dumbfounded] I learned that from the pizza man.
- Meg: Well, A plus for you. I feel so... clean.
- Samuel Campbell: Is this what you boys do? Sit around and watch porno's with angels?
- Castiel: We're not supposed to talk about it.
- Samuel Campbell: Tell me, what exactly are you supposed to be to me?
- Dean Winchester: I'll tell you who I am. I'm the guy you never wanna see again. 'Cause I'll make it out of here, trust me. The next time you see me, I'll be there to kill you.
- Samuel Campbell: Don't think there's gonna be a next time.
- Dean Winchester: Whatever gets you through the night.
- Meg: [Strapped to a metal bed being tortured with the demon knife] You know, you're sticking that thing in all the wrong places.
- Christian Campbell: Really? You sure were squealing.
- Meg: Knock yourself out. It's a host body. Some girl from Sheboygan, moved to LA to be an actress. It's probably not even the worst thing that ever happened to her.
- [Meg screams as Christian continues torturing her with Ruby's knife, then suddenly starts laughing]
- Christian Campbell: What are you laughing at?
- [Dean appears behind him, grabs the knife out of his hand and stabs him in the back]
- Meg: Dean Winchester's behind you, meatsack.
- Dean Winchester: Sam?
- Sam Winchester: Yea?
- Dean Winchester: I'm standing in pee!
- Sam Winchester: Consider yourself lucky.
- Dean Winchester: Yikes. That's gross.
- Crowley: [Talking to shapeshifter that is mimicking his appearance] Sorry, but your exceptional good looks aren't gonna buy you any mercy.
- Sam Winchester: Castiel. We need you. It's important.
- [Nothing. Tries a different tactic]
- Sam Winchester: Cass, we found something. It's this gold box. Apparently, Nazis were after it back in the day. Someone tried to open it and their face melted off. We think it's, uh... Ready for this? The Ark of the Covenant. So...
- Castiel: [Appears] I'm here, Sam. Where is the box?
- Sam Winchester: I can't believe you fell for that. That was the plot of Raiders.
- Dean Winchester: [Sam and Dean wake up tied to chairs facing one another] What now?
- Sam Winchester: I think I know who you can ask.
- Dean Winchester: [Looks over his shoulder] Evil bitch.
- Meg: Keep sweet-talking me; this could go a whole new direction.
- Dean Winchester: Meg. I've been dying to see you again.
- Meg: Well, here I am, big boy. So what should we do now?
- Dean Winchester: How 'bout I rip you to shreds?
- Meg: Kinky, I like. But a little Q n' A first if you don't mind. Now where's your boss?
- Dean Winchester: You want forgiveness, find a priest.
- Samuel Campbell: I just want you to understand-...
- Dean Winchester: Oh, I understand that you're a liar. You talk about putting blood first, which is funny, you sound just like my dad. Difference is, he actually did.
- Demon Christian Campbell: So Crowley wants to know... Well, everything. He told me to carve it out of you.
- Meg: Whatever makes you feel like a man.
- Dean Winchester: [after Meg bolts] Well, she's smart. I'll give her that. I was gonna kill her too.
- [Turns to Castiel]
- Dean Winchester: Of course, I'd have given you an hour with her first.
- Castiel: [Confused] Why would I want that?
- Dean Winchester: We've been going on these runs and it's not getting us anywhere.
- Sam Winchester: Dean-...
- Dean Winchester: The only thing that's really changed is now I need a daily rape shower.
- Sam Winchester: Okay, you're right. Let's go with plan B. Oh, yeah, we don't have one. So till we do, sorry, dude, stock up on soap on a rope.