- Beth Littleford: [about the Macarena dance craze] We white people do love to dance in formation, don't we?
- Jaleel White: [about Dennis Rodman] Who the hell wouldn't show up at a Barnes & Noble to see a 6' 8" black man in a wedding dress?
- Scott Ian: [about the Macarena song] There's at least eight million morons in this country because that's how many people bought the records.
- Himself (as The Modern Humorist): [about Oasis] All their song names were like drink names. "I'll take a 'Champagne Supernova', a 'Wonderwall', two Harvey Wallbangers and a Long Island iced tea."