"Schwarzwaldliebe" or "The Farmer and the Stewardess" is a German television movie from 2009, so this is already over 10 years old and while the German title is already bad, I have no idea what they were doing with the international title because she works as a lawyer and not a stewardess. Maybe this is what they had initially in mind for her I don't know. But it shows already what a mess this film is and that tehy simply did not care during any production stage of this film I think. Or didn't have the talent, probably both and looking at the other projects he was in charge of I cannot really say I am surprised this one here turned out really bad (Unter Uns, Hinter Gittern...). He also worked on other Schmonzetten as we say here in Germany and this means cheesy unrealistic romantic films for the easily entertained who switch off their brains. This almost rhymes even haha. Anyway, like most other of these films it runs for under 90 minutes. It says it all that basically Kim Fisher (just a host really) was cast as an actress here, probably thanks to her popularity. Popularity back then I should say, not popularity today and it reminds me a bit of Silbereisen being cast to be the new Traumschiff captain, even if there he plays a lead obviously. Anyway, let us not drift too far away. The lead actress here is Claudine Wilde and I thhought she was simply horrible. She has been in many other bad projects too in her career. I see no acting talent whatsoever. Shame is true about Timothy Peach and I think many mistake him for a quality actor because of his somewhat exotic English name. But for him it also is the truth that he is probably not even good enough for supporting characters 90% of the time, let alone for lead roles like in this movie here. It is such a gigantic mess. Now it took somebody special to really turn this horrible horrible script into an even worse movie, but Wilde and Peach managed the impossible.
I will not go too much into detail about the story, just give you a few references and scenes or moments when the film sucked the most. Of course, the first thing here is as always that you knew the two would get together from beginning to end. Also during their stupid conflicts about who is going to buy the farm. Wilde's character is supposed to be really capable as we find out because out of nowhere she manages on her own to make sure everything goes right when a calf is born. The male protagonist's mother touches her arms on one occasion and acts in a way where she is muscular enough to help on the farm. As for how the two main characters met, well she has a puncture, but of course he is busy and cool and man enough to first fix something else and have her wait for him. And don't even get me started on the screen writers here thinking quotes like "he picked me up errr. I mean he picked my car up" were funny. Unreal stuff. 100% cringe and again props to Wilde for managing the impossible to really make this horrible quote even worse with her line delivery. Oh yeah at the end, there is this pseudo-dramatic scene at the airport too where she could be gone forvere, but of course he shows up in time to confess his love to her. And there is also another guy in play as the female protagonist is not single and of course we should not forget how desirable she is. But this one is of course just a bad guy because they let us know he flirted with the reception girl or so and this was included briefly so we don't mind about the protagonists making out one scene later. Hey being unfaithful is cool as long as your partner is as well. And he did not care about her anyway as he tells her in the most disrespectful manner that he does not want to be friends with her after the break-up. Of course, there are also cringeworthy songs (like at the very end the oh so talented girl singing) and in general the soundtrack is way over the top. Ah yes, we also should not forget how Peach is also a great catch because the female protagonist's friend makes it very clear that she would want him too. What else? Ah yes for pseudo health drama struggles we get the male protagonist's mother collapsing on one occasion, of course just seconds after Wilde's character says soemthing like it could happen faster than we thing, but there Peach's character is also fully the man in charge and so alpha when he carries the old lady inside and also instructs his father what to do. Sometimes this film as really so bad it was entertaining. Like the guy who is in charge of managing the sale of the farm on one occasion is seen with his reception girl on the lap making plans about a holiday together. Now this is what office life looks like. Or actually how to shhow the easily influenced that he is a bad guy. I mean if you expect subtlety in a film like this, you are the one to blame. The writers did a fine job of course. Oh well, probably you don't get irony then either, do you? Okay I wasted already far too many lines on this film. It was plain horrible. One thing I also want to say that finally taking into account how much of the film is set in the nature, it is extremely disappointing in terms of cinematography and nature we actually see. I wish they could have delivered even there, but no. Stay far far away from this movie. It is among the very worst the film year 2009 had to offer and I am not just talking about German releases, but worldwide. Highly not recommended. This should never be shown again, not even on television at noon.
I will not go too much into detail about the story, just give you a few references and scenes or moments when the film sucked the most. Of course, the first thing here is as always that you knew the two would get together from beginning to end. Also during their stupid conflicts about who is going to buy the farm. Wilde's character is supposed to be really capable as we find out because out of nowhere she manages on her own to make sure everything goes right when a calf is born. The male protagonist's mother touches her arms on one occasion and acts in a way where she is muscular enough to help on the farm. As for how the two main characters met, well she has a puncture, but of course he is busy and cool and man enough to first fix something else and have her wait for him. And don't even get me started on the screen writers here thinking quotes like "he picked me up errr. I mean he picked my car up" were funny. Unreal stuff. 100% cringe and again props to Wilde for managing the impossible to really make this horrible quote even worse with her line delivery. Oh yeah at the end, there is this pseudo-dramatic scene at the airport too where she could be gone forvere, but of course he shows up in time to confess his love to her. And there is also another guy in play as the female protagonist is not single and of course we should not forget how desirable she is. But this one is of course just a bad guy because they let us know he flirted with the reception girl or so and this was included briefly so we don't mind about the protagonists making out one scene later. Hey being unfaithful is cool as long as your partner is as well. And he did not care about her anyway as he tells her in the most disrespectful manner that he does not want to be friends with her after the break-up. Of course, there are also cringeworthy songs (like at the very end the oh so talented girl singing) and in general the soundtrack is way over the top. Ah yes, we also should not forget how Peach is also a great catch because the female protagonist's friend makes it very clear that she would want him too. What else? Ah yes for pseudo health drama struggles we get the male protagonist's mother collapsing on one occasion, of course just seconds after Wilde's character says soemthing like it could happen faster than we thing, but there Peach's character is also fully the man in charge and so alpha when he carries the old lady inside and also instructs his father what to do. Sometimes this film as really so bad it was entertaining. Like the guy who is in charge of managing the sale of the farm on one occasion is seen with his reception girl on the lap making plans about a holiday together. Now this is what office life looks like. Or actually how to shhow the easily influenced that he is a bad guy. I mean if you expect subtlety in a film like this, you are the one to blame. The writers did a fine job of course. Oh well, probably you don't get irony then either, do you? Okay I wasted already far too many lines on this film. It was plain horrible. One thing I also want to say that finally taking into account how much of the film is set in the nature, it is extremely disappointing in terms of cinematography and nature we actually see. I wish they could have delivered even there, but no. Stay far far away from this movie. It is among the very worst the film year 2009 had to offer and I am not just talking about German releases, but worldwide. Highly not recommended. This should never be shown again, not even on television at noon.