Hulk Vs. (2009 Video)

Nolan North: Deadpool

Quotes 

• Deadpool : Hey! Wait for me!

  [Deadpool jumps on a rampaging Hulk] 

  Deadpool : Who wants snacks? YOU do!

  [Deadpool forces a grenade down the Hulk's gullet and then jumps off, landing alongside Wolverine, and the two run down a straight hallway with the Hulk in pursuit] 

  Deadpool : Logan, I think we lost him!

  [the grenade inside the Hulk explodes...] 

  Deadpool : And they all lived happily ever after, except the Hulk!

  Wolverine : Bub... you just made him angrier!

  Hulk : Talking man hurt Hulk... HULK RIP OFF TALKING MAN'S HEAD!

  Deadpool : My head? Oh, crap...!

  Wolverine : He's all yours, Einstein!

  [grabs Deadpool and throws him towards the Hulk] 

  Deadpool : Logan? We're friends! NO! NOOO!

• Deadpool : I can't believe it... I'm alive. I'm alive!

  [the Hulk lands on top of him and leaps away] 

  Deadpool : [weakly]  Ow...

• Deadpool : [falling on Wolverine]  BANZAI!

  [Wolverine slices Deadpool's arm off] 

  Deadpool : AAH! Ow! Oh... dude, that is just *not* cool!

  [looks at the stump on his body, then his arm some meters away] 

  Deadpool : Wow! Look at that! Could you give me a hand?

  [giggles] 

  Deadpool : Just kidding! All right... I'll go get it.

  [runs to fix his arm back on] 

• The Professor : Weapon X is indeed glad to have you back, Logan. We put considerable time and money into you.

  Deadpool : And pointy things!

• Bruce Banner : No!

  Deadpool : Yes. As in, "Yes, you're going to die." BANG! Just kidding.

• Deadpool : What do you say after the mission, we kill all of those floating babies?

  Omega Red : Do you ever shut up, Wilson?

  Deadpool : What? Babies creep me out.

  [cradles his rife] 

  Deadpool : [singalong]  Rock-a-bye-BANG!

  [chortles] 

• Deadpool : Logan, we missed you! And Weapon X just hasn't been the same without you. Nobody calls me "bub" anymore, and Omega Red's a bed wetter...

  Omega Red : [entering]  One day I will tear out your flippant tongue, Wilson.

  Deadpool : [whispering to Wolverine]  He's very ashamed.

• Wolverine : [to the Professor]  What do you want with the Hulk?

  Deadpool : We just wanna help him find his happy place. Did you see how angry he was? I mean, I'm sorry, but come on. I think his pants are too tight...

  [Omega Red's tentacle wraps around his neck and starts choking him] 

• Deadpool : [after being choked by Omega Red]  Argh... so not cool... I hate that guy!

  [walks towards Wolverine] 

  Deadpool : Wolverine, you look so sad. Hey, if it makes you feel any better, Lady Deathstrike tried to kill you when you were asleep.

  Wolverine : Better than having to listen to you.

  Deadpool : Man, does she hate you. I mean, we all hate you, but Deathstrike really, Really, REALLY hates you!

  [takes out his gun] 

  Deadpool : Hey, still have that unbreakable skull?

  [Points gun at Wolverine's head and fires. Screen turns black] 

  Deadpool : Oh... damn it!

• [the Hulk and Wolverine are apprehended with knockout bullets] 

  Sabretooth : [to Wolverine]  Thanks, runt. We've been trying to take him down for weeks.

  Deadpool : Hey, Logan, it's me, Deadpool! I shot you...

  [Wolverine falls unconscious] 

• The Professor : You were our best operative, Wolverine. So disappointing. But you did lead us to Dr. Banner. Of course, you know him better as the Hulk.

  Deadpool : [reveals gun and ammo]  I shot him in the ass, with one of these!

  [Everyone glares at him] 

  Deadpool : What? I did!

• Deadpool : [looking at the Professor]  Well, he's alive, but I think he's going to need some serious TLC.

  Sabretooth : The last thing the Professor said before the runt gutted him was for us to kill Wolverine.

  Deadpool : Really? Hmm...

  [to Omega Red] 

  Deadpool : You buy that? Yeah, you know, I would think the last thing he said was, "Ah, Sabretooth!"

  Omega Red : We kill Wolverine now. That is all that matters.

  Deadpool : Whatever you say, ponytail. Who am I to say no to a little murder?

  [draws his guns] 

  Deadpool : [to Team X]  Strike a pose!

• Lady Deathstrike : GAIJIN!

  Sabretooth : End of the line, runt! Got any last words?

  Wolverine : Yeah... TWO!

  [Wolverine charges] 

  Deadpool : [draws his katanas]  Let's dance!