- The Amazing Steve: Hey, there's a lot of flammable stuff around here! Half my act is homemade napalm.
- Justin Frost: I guess what I wanted to say was that... I'm sorry, for not being a badass. I'm sorry that I don't have a mullet or that I fucking ride a dirt bike and I throw cigarettes at people and I treat women like shit. Is that what you want? Innua... I'll have a pickup truck and throw you in the back and call you a bitch. I'm sorry, I am sorry... I guess... just... enjoy your salad... enjoy your salad.
- Galaxy: [about Geocaching] You download latitude and longitude coordinates from a website into your GPS, which leads you to these caches that people hid.
- Justin Frost: Hello. El nerdo alerto. Doink.
- Galaxy: It's not nerdy, it's actually cool, and you have to be smart, you know? And, like, good with puzzles. So not nerdy, at all.
- Justin Frost: Okay. That's actually the definition of nerdy, the way you're describing it.
- Wyoming: A golden cow is galloping on your shoulders. It is the cow of awakening. Ride the cow! Ride the cow away to your noonan.
- The Amazing Steve: Tell her you'll do it.
- Justin Frost: I'll do it.
- Justin Frost: I was your mark?
- Galaxy: Yeah... That was different. I mean, you were easy.
- Justin Frost: Oh. Well, I was distracted. I'm not used to full service.
- Galaxy: See, I thought this was all nerdy.
- Justin Frost: Oh, it is. Yeah. It's super nerdy, actually. It's just that, uh, nerd and nerd equals cool. It's like two negatives and a positive. Math thing, I don't know. Just tryin' to speak your language.
- [first lines]
- Justin Frost: [to imaginary adversaries] Easy everybody. Don't get hurt.
- [karate cry]
- Justin Frost: You, come here.
- Betty: I am in love, Susan. Look at him. He rocks my world like no other.
- Susan Frost: Well that's because there's been no other body.