Night at the Museum: Battle of the Smithsonian (2009)

Owen Wilson: Jedediah

Photos 

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Quotes 

• Jedediah : [When Octavius is trying to get Jedediah out of the hourglass]  I wanna get to the story of our relationship, the evolution from enemy to friends.

  Octavius : No!

  Jedediah : It'll make you cry.

  Octavius : No! Because you are going to live!

  [uses his helmet to smash the hourglass] 

• Jedediah : Well, lookee here. If it ain't Mr. Big-in-the-Britches himself, come back in time to see us off?

  Larry Daley : Yeah, Jed, I heard. Look, I don't even know how this happened.

  [Larry's answers his cellphone] 

  Jedediah : Yeah. Yeah, real mystery how this happened. Maybe the answer's on that magic buzzin' box there in your hand! You weren't here, Gigantor! That's how it happened! Ain't no mystery!

  Octavius : The fact is, Larry, there's no one else here to speak on our behalf during business hours.

  Easter Island Head : None, none, dum, dum.

• Octavius : What's a flapjack?

  Jedediah : It's like a biscuit... or a scone.

• Kah Mun Rah : You certainly know how to make an entrance, Mr. Daley. Hope for your little friend's sake here,

  [he shakes the hourglass] 

  Kah Mun Rah : that you also figured out the combination.

  Larry Daley : [reaching for the hourglass]  Give me Jed!

  Kah Mun Rah : Oh no, no, no, first give me the combination and hand over that Tablet.

  [reaches for the Tablet] 

  Larry Daley : I'll give you the Tablet and the combination when you release my friends and give him back to me.

  Kah Mun Rah : I shall release what I want to release at the moment I want to release it.

  Larry Daley : Great, and I'll release what I want to release at the exact moment that I want to release it, okay?

  Kah Mun Rah : Tell me the combination and give me the tablet right now or i shall KILL all of your friends starting with this little shaggy-headed little cowman here!

  Jedediah : I ain't shaggy-headed! Gigantor, let me take this guy!

  Larry Daley : Don't worry, I got this handled.

  [to Kahmunrah] 

  Larry Daley : You don't want to give me my friends, then you're not gonna get your combination or your Tablet.

  Kah Mun Rah : Alright, I'll tell you what, alright. They didn't call me Kahmunrah the Trustworthy for nothing, alright?

  [starts to hand him the hourglass] 

  Kah Mun Rah : Here you go...

  [jerks it back] 

  Kah Mun Rah : They DIDN'T call me Kahmunrah the trustworthy! They called me Kahmunrah the BLOODTHIRSTY, who kills whoever doesn't give Kahmunrah exactly what he wants in the moment that he wants it, which is RIGHT NOW, when I had also better get the combination and the Tablet!

  Larry Daley : That's what they called you?

  Kah Mun Rah : It was shorter in Egyptian.

• Jedediah : I didn't call you because we were in trouble... okay, we were in a pickle. But it wouldn't be the first time I had to fast talk my way out of a jam! I called you because you needed us.

• [last lines] 

  Larry Daley : You know, a good place to check out is the miniatures.

  Woman : Can you take me there? I always get lost.

  Larry Daley : Yeah, no, sure. Yeah, come on...

  Jedediah : [flying in a miniature plane]  Yeehaw!

• Kah Mun Rah : [to Jedediah in the birdcage]  Why, they're no bigger than a tiny grain of couscous. Aren't you?

  Jedediah : You know, two words come to mind when I hear you talk. "Delusional" and "weirdo". And if I had to say a third, "goofy." Just goofy.

• Jedediah : [to Larry]  That fancy suit you've been paradin' around in these last couple years, that there's a hangin' suit. All gussied up and dead inside, that ain't you. And I'll tell you another thing; this night ain't over yet. This midnight cowboy's got some fight left in him, and somethin' tells me you do too. Ho, now!

  [puts his fist to the glass] 

• Jedediah : [referring to Kahmunrah]  He is not a friendly; I repeat, *not* a friendly!

• Jedediah : You're crazier than a road lizard.