- Comic mayhem ensues when two lovely blondes, Dee and Dawn, are mistaken as international mob killers.
- Dee and Dawn are two dim-witted, pink-clad blonde ladies who meet by accident and try to make a living with their dull lives until a series of circumstances ensue when they unwittingly take jobs at a local strip club. They are mistaken for two deadly female brunette assassins, known only as the Cat and the Kit, who are hired to kill the club owner who is a mobster in a witness protection program. With two persistent but inept FBI agents on their tails, ditzy Dee and Dawn try to stay one step ahead of the law--and also try to figure out what is really going on.—Anonymous
- Two dumb blondes, Dee Twiddle (Pamela Anderson) and Dawn St. Dom (Denise Richards), meet each other at their first lesson in flight school. Dee is a big-breasted professional dancer with a pet turtle, Vegurle, who has a gas problem. Dawn is a former secretary who has tried to be a dancer. After meeting with each other in the flight school bathroom, they take off in their plane without the instructor (they simply assume that the other is the instructor). Dom sits in the pilot's seat and manages to turn on the engine by reading her instructions manual. She assumes that Dee is the instructor who will tell her if she is doing anything wrong. Dee assumes that Dom is the instructor and is showing her what to do, as she takes notes. When they notice that it's their first lesson, the blondes panic and crash into a golf course. The blondes survive the crash with no injuries.
The blondes eventually become friends and they notice that they have been neighbors for nearly a year. Dawn got fired for typos at her last job (as a secretary at a talent agency) and she had no clue what typos are. She also used the whitening marker on the computer screen. Dee is also in between jobs. They both decide that they are good at dancing (even though they are terrible at dancing). Dee decides to help Dawn get a dancing gig at the Beaver Patch Lounge and takes her for an audition, after they see the ad in the newspaper.
Meanwhile, the Vancouver Italian Mafia Godfather (Alex Bruhanski) decides to whack Lou Ramoli (Jay Brazeau), a former mafia member and current informant, who is running the Beaver Patch Lounge in Vancouver. Godfather and his crew find out about Ramoli's location from the ad in the newspaper where Ramoli used his real name. Ramoli is under the witness protection program of the FBI and is being protected by two federal agents Campbell and Gardenia. The FBI knows that Ramoli's cover is blown and is looking to relocate him to his new identity.
The Godfather of the mob sends a female assassin, Cat (Emmanuelle Vaugier) and her assistant Kit (Meghan Ory) to whack Ramoli. The assassin is virtually unknown in the mafia world, with nobody knowing her true identity, and is considered to be very intelligent. Cat has a perfect track record and even her victims don't see her face. She never leaves any traces. Godfather says that if the assassin succeeds, she will be asked to assassinate infamous Mr. Wong next. We learn that both Cat and Kit are brunettes. Kat wants to move into the big leagues and start taking on assignments herself, but Cat is holding her back. Cat promises Kit that this is her last job and Kit will get the next one.
Evangelos (John Tench) is Ramoli's partner and tries to warn him, but Ramoli believes that the mob has forgotten all about him. The assassins succeed when Cat manages to disguise herself as one of the audition takers and enter Ramoli's office completely unseen by anyone. Ramoli is murdered right before Dee and Dawn's audition, who were waiting next in line. The Mobsters, Leo (Kevin Farley) and Swan (John Farley) were supposed to monitor what was happening, after seeing Dee and Dawn run from the club, they mistake the blondes for being the infamous assassins Cat and Kit.
Leo and Swan follow Dee and Dawn to their homes and say that they work for the Godfather. Knowing that Dee and Dawn are assassins, Leo and Swan offer them $250,000 to "take out" Hang Wong (Byron Mann), the head of the Triads in Niagara Falls, Ontario. Dee and Dawn agree, but they think that they have to take Wong on a date. The word spreads quickly that the female assassin has taken a contract for Mr Wong. Kit is angry with Cat as Cat had promised her the next job.
Federal agents discover the plan to kill Wong and follow the blonde duo also thinking they are Cat and Kit. The girls use the case given by Leo and Swan to buy a 2nd hand car to drive to Niagara Falls. The Godfather sends Leo and Swan to follow the girls to make sure Wong gets whacked. He is worried that the assassin has taken on an apprentice on the job without taking his explicit permission, as per the terms of the contract. Once the blonde duo arrives in Niagara Falls, they settle at a casino hotel and resort, which Mr. Wong owns. Cat and Kit also arrive there and find out that Dee and Dawn are pretending to be them and have been the hired assassins. They plan to get revenge because Dee and Dawn stole their reputation for whacking Ramoli and are pretending to be them to kill Wong.
While Dawn is winning money at the casino, Dee meets Mr. Wong during his meeting with Leo and Swan. Dee tells Wong that Leo and Swan hired her to show him a good time. Federal agents spot Dee with Wong in the casino and chase them. Wong decides to kidnap Dee and takes her to his yacht. Meanwhile, they are chased by the federal agents, Campbell (Joey Aresco) and Gardenia (Garry Chalk) , Cat and Kit. The federal agents and police take everyone into custody.
Back at the casino, the police arrest Kit and Cat when they brag about being the real assassins, and also Wong for kidnapping Dee. Dawn finally finds her dream guy and with the millions of dollars Dawn won at the casino, Dee and Dawn establish Dee and Dawn's Famous Turtle Sanctuary in the countryside where they only have one turtle but promise to have more soon.
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![Pamela Anderson and Denise Richards in Blonde and Blonder (2008)](https://m.media-amazon.com/images/M/MV5BNjY2Nzc0NTI1NF5BMl5BanBnXkFtZTcwMDE3Mjc1MQ@@._V1_QL75_UX90_CR0,0,90,133_.jpg)