How I Met Your Mother (TV Series)
Atlantic City (2006)
Jason Segel: Marshall Eriksen
Photos
Quotes
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Narrator : [about the game Shing Hasabu Shing] Now, I had been to a lot of casinos before that night, and I've been to a lot of casinos since, but in all that time I've never seen a game quite like this one. To this day, I have no idea how it was played. But luckily, Barney did.
Lily Aldrin : Do you understand what's happening?
Ted Mosby : Not a clue.
Robin Scherbatsky : Do you think he's winning?
Ted Mosby : I don't even know if he's playing.
Marshall Eriksen : Wait, I get it. I understand this game.
Ted Mosby : No, you don't.
Marshall Eriksen : I totally understand the game, Theodore. Barney, split your tiles. You can triple your money if you find the jellybean.
Barney Stinson : Marshall, please. Don't you think I know what I'm... My God, you're right.
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Marshall Eriksen : I don't get it. Hundreds of people get married in Atlantic City all the time.
Registrar : Yes, but not to elope. They come for the white, sandy beaches, world-class amenities and Riviera-like ambience.
Lily Aldrin : Are you kidding me? Have you been outside?
Ted Mosby : There is half a rotting orca whale not ten feet from our room.
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Marshall Eriksen : [after having sex on the kitchen] That was a creative use of pancake syrup.
Lily Aldrin : I can't even look Mrs. Butterworth in the eye.
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Barney Stinson : All right, let's talk bachelor party. Are we thinking full-on strip club, or should we rent a room and have a private toy show?
Ted Mosby : What did you just say?
Marshall Eriksen : Barney, no.
Barney Stinson : Marshall, I'm your best man.
Marshall Eriksen : You're not my best man.
Ted Mosby : Right here.
Barney Stinson : And as your best man, I have to throw you a bachelor party. That's part of being a best friend.
Marshall Eriksen : You're not my best friend.
Ted Mosby : Right here.
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Marshall Eriksen : Hi, we need a marriage license but we need to skip the waiting period because we're in love.
Receptionist : Aaww... I'm gonna waive this waiting period right now!
Lily Aldrin : Really?
Receptionist : Is what I would say if I could waive the waiting period but unfortunately only a judge can do that.
Lily Aldrin : Oh, so can we see a judge?
Receptionist : Absolutely!
Lily Aldrin : Really?
Receptionist : Is what I would say if there was any chance of you seeing a judge today, which there isn't.
Marshall Eriksen : [Clenched teeth] Why are you doing this to us?
Receptionist : Because you're on CANDID CAMERA!
Robin Scherbatsky : Really?
Receptionist : Is what I would say...
Marshall Eriksen : [Interrupting] You know what? We get it.
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Narrator : When they called off their first wedding, Aunt Lily took off for San Francisco leaving Uncle Marshall with the unfortunate task of telling his entire family.
Marshall Eriksen : [Flashback, Marshall's] Yeah, so now she's gone and the wedding's off. What do you call someone who just takes off and leaves like that? What do you call that? I think that that's a little strong. I can't even believe you would use a word like that. Geez, Grandma.