- Captain Jack Harkness: Tosh was right though, she went for the ex boyfriend. Lucky she's young. Work your way through my back catalogue, we'll be here till the sun explodes.
- Captain Jack Harkness: [to the delivery man Carys has been about to shag] Put your trousers on and get out. NOW!
- [the delivery man goes]
- Captain Jack Harkness: It almost breaks my heart to say those words.
- Captain Jack Harkness: Alright, usual formation.
- Gwen Cooper: What's the usual formation?
- Owen Harper: Varies.
- Gwen Cooper: How can the usual formation vary?
- Captain Jack Harkness: [watching CCTV] Wow.
- Toshiko Sato: My God!
- Gwen Cooper: He just...
- Captain Jack Harkness: Came and went.
- Owen Harper: Now that's how I'd like to go.
- Toshiko Sato: I'm sure we could arrange it.
- Gwen Cooper: I mean it was just gas, wasn't it? Can't be too bad. Can it?
- Owen Harper: Right, because gas never did anyone any harm.
- Captain Jack Harkness: You want to prove yourself? Find her. Get your old pals in the police to do something useful for once.
- Gwen Cooper: All right, I'll give them a call. Put out an A.P.B. "Woman posessed by gas knobbing fellas to death."
- Captain Jack Harkness: That was just a kiss, imagine the buzz you'd get from the rest.
- [girl in his arms faints]
- Captain Jack Harkness: Wasn't exactly the reaction I anticipated.
- Toshiko Sato: You've got a boyfriend?
- Gwen Cooper: Yeah. You?
- Toshiko Sato: Haven't got time with this job.
- Gwen Cooper: What about you?
- Owen Harper: You gotta be joking. I can get all the grief I need here.
- Gwen Cooper: None of you have partners?
- Owen Harper: Just you.
- Gwen Cooper: I'm not being rude or anything- well, maybe I am, but- how do you switch off from all this? What do you do to relax?
- Owen Harper: I torture people in happy relationships.
- Owen Harper: [Gwen is snogging Carys] I thought she said she had a boyfriend?
- Captain Jack Harkness: You people and your quaint little categories.
- Captain Jack Harkness: So what's our next move?
- Owen Harper: Stop the entire city of Cardiff from shagging?
- Gwen Cooper: Put bromide in the water supply.
- Captain Jack Harkness: No. Too hit and miss.
- Owen Harper: Yeah, and the water company got really pissed off the last time we did that.
- Gwen Cooper: That girl's body has been overrun by I don't know what, and you think it's a joke?
- Owen Harper: Jesus, sorry!
- Gwen Cooper: We should be helping her, she's not some lab rat.
- Owen Harper: No, she's a murderer. And you were the one who wanted her caught. How come suddenly she's your best friend?
- Captain Jack Harkness: [to Gwen] You know, strictly speaking, throttling the staff is my job.
- Ianto Jones: [entering] Who wants Chinese?
- Gwen Cooper: I don't know anything.
- Owen Harper: Not who he is, not where he's from, not anything. Except... him being gay.
- Gwen Cooper: No he's not. really, do you think?
- Toshiko Sato: Owen does, I don't.
- Ianto Jones: And I don't care.
- Owen Harper: Period military is not the dress code of a straight man.
- Gwen Cooper: I think it suits him. Sort of classic.
- Toshiko Sato: Exactly! I've watched him in action, he'll shag anything if it's gorgeous enough.
- Gwen Cooper: We know he's from America, right?
- Owen Harper: Don't even know that for sure.
- Toshiko Sato: No US citizen by the name of Jack Harkness born in the last fifty years.
- Gwen Cooper: Maybe his identity's classified.
- Ianto Jones: Used to be something big in the CIA, that's what I reckon.
- Gwen Cooper: He must have his reasons for wanting to keep things secret.
- Owen Harper: Sure he has. Doesn't stop me from wanting to know.
- Gwen Cooper: Is this CrimInt? This is the police computer system, you shouldn't have this.
- Captain Jack Harkness: Might wanna stop saying "you" and start saying "we".
- Captain Jack Harkness: What do we know?
- Owen Harper: Bog standard space debris. That's a technical term.
- Gwen Cooper: [questioning an alien] Right sorry. Just to recap, you've traveled here to feed off orgasmic energy?
- Owen Harper: Make yourself useful, sweetheart, pass us the big chisel from the toolbox.
- Gwen Cooper: It's Gwen, not sweetheart. One syllable, I'm sure you can manage it.
- Owen Harper: Not sweet cheeks, then? New girl?
- Gwen Cooper: Shame your tool's not big enough for the job.
- Owen Harper: 119 suspects - this things supposed to give us one clear match.
- Toshiko Sato: The CCTV was too low-res. Enlarge it and it breaks up, which means the software can't function properly.
- Ianto Jones: It's narrowed it down, I can check through the others. You know, the old-fashioned way - with my eyes?
- [the captive alien has made it up to reception with the doctor's hand as a hostage]
- Ianto Jones: Need me to do any attacking, sir?
- Captain Jack Harkness: Appreciate the offer. Just open the door.
- Gwen Cooper: What about his family? You can't just fake his death!
- Captain Jack Harkness: You want to tell his family he died screwing an alien?
- Private Moriarty: Who the hell are you?
- Gwen Cooper: Hi. Sorry.
- Sgt. Johnson: This area's restricited.
- Gwen Cooper: No, it's alright. I'm with Special Ops. I'm Special Ops. Torchwood? I'm with Torchwood.
- Sgt. Johnson: Don't mess with me, little girl. You're not with Torchwood. And even if you were...
- Captain Jack Harkness: [pushing past] You'd have put out the welcome banners. Now, first of all, she's no little girl. From where I'm standing, all the right curves in all the right places. But she is Torchwood, we both are, and we'd appreciate it if you'd leave us to do the real work.
- Gwen Cooper: So what's that supposed to do?
- Captain Jack Harkness: I'm using satellite tracking data to determine the inward trajectory of the meteorite.
- Toshiko Sato: He means he's trying to find out where its come from.
- Captain Jack Harkness: Hey, sometimes a little techno-babble is good for the soul.
- Owen Harper: Oi, you lot. Treat.
- Toshiko Sato: Whoa.
- Captain Jack Harkness: Wow.
- Owen Harper: I thought she said she had a boyfriend.
- Captain Jack Harkness: You people and your quaint little categories.
- Toshiko Sato: We should really get her out of there.
- Captain Jack Harkness: Yeah. I mean, yeah. Come on.
- Owen Harper: Just record a bit first.