- Al Tobias: What is this? Who are you people?
- Governor Eugene Xavier Gatling: This is Jeffrey Pendleton the Jamaican industrialist.
- Al Tobias: Yeah.
- Governor Eugene Xavier Gatling: He's worth more than a hundred million of your dollars.
- Al Tobias: Oh.
- Governor Eugene Xavier Gatling: You're familiar with the name?
- Al Tobias: No, I'm familiar with the number.
- Governor Eugene Xavier Gatling: Benson, I would appreciate this as a personal favor.
- Benson DuBois: Oh, brother. What's the matter with Pete? Let Pete do it.
- Peter 'Pete' John Downey: What? Me? The Governor don't even like me to eat in public.
- Miss Gretchen Wilomena Kraus: [Kraus is doing facial exercises] If I do these exercises faithfully, I'll have a face like Brooke Shields.
- Benson DuBois: That'll be interesting. Brooke Shields face on Big Bird's body.
- Katherine 'Katie' Olivia Gatling: [Everybody has just heard the botched recording of Kraus singing] Well, that was very interesting. I'm gonna go outside and play. A child needs lots of fresh air and activity.
- Miss Gretchen Wilomena Kraus: Uh, hey, Benson, could I appear on the telethon?
- Benson DuBois: What?
- Miss Gretchen Wilomena Kraus: I mean, I'd be glad to sing a few songs.
- Benson DuBois: Kraus, we're trying to raise money not drive rats from the city.
- Clayton Runnymede Endicott III: I thought you'd be touchy after seeing the newspaper.
- Benson DuBois: What's in the newspaper?
- Miss Gretchen Wilomena Kraus: His picture.
- Benson DuBois: What a photograph or one of those police sketches?
- Benson DuBois: What is it, Clayton, another one of those big checks?
- Clayton Runnymede Endicott III: Uh, the magician didn't show up.
- Benson DuBois: Well, looks like our magician disappeared.
- Governor Eugene Xavier Gatling: [Benson is reluctant to be a host of telethon] Just be yourself.
- Benson DuBois: Fine, I'll be home watching the telethon.
- Denise Florence Stevens: The moon is in the 7th house.
- Peter 'Pete' John Downey: And Jupiter is aligned with Mars.
- Benson DuBois: Tis the dawning of the Age of Aquarius.