- Governor Eugene Xavier Gatling: [Someone knocks on the door] Come in. That must be my sandwich.
- Clayton Runnymede Endicott III: [Clayton comes into the office] Gentleman.
- Benson DuBois: Oh, I see you ordered turkey.
- Miss Gretchen Wilomena Kraus: There is nothing wrong with my tomatoes.
- Benson DuBois: I will pass up this golden opportunity.
- Benson DuBois: [Speaking to Clayton] Are you gonna get out of my office, or do I have to call an exorcist?
- Benson DuBois: [Benson is losing patience with the robot] Why don't you go play in an electrical storm?
- Denise Florence Stevens Downey: I agree with them, Pete.
- Peter 'Pete' John Downey: Denise, please this is man talk.
- Denise Florence Stevens Downey: Benson, when you get through with the robot, do you mind roughing up this jerk?
- Benson DuBois: [the robot has just been fired and has asked what shall he do] You're smart, JIMM. Get together with a few other appliances and try to get on Family Feud.
- Miss Gretchen Wilomena Kraus: All right, where is that two-timing tin turkey?
- Benson DuBois: Did you and toggle-head have a lover's quarrel?
- Governor Eugene Xavier Gatling: [Benson is trying to find money in the state budget for education] We're gonna need even more money in the future. People are having children again.
- Benson DuBois: Oh, as opposed to kittens and puppies.