Everybody Loves Raymond (TV Series)

No Roll! (2001)

Ray Romano: Ray Barone

Photos 

Quotes 

• Marie Barone : This game must be Debra's doing.

  Ray Barone : Well, it's not.

  Marie Barone : I should have guessed when I opened the fridge with two bottles of white wine? Are you swingers?

  Ray Barone : All right, Ma. You just asked if I was a wife-swapper.

  Frank Barone : Now, there's an idea. I don't even have to swap. I'll just make a donation.

• [Ray buys Deborah a sex game] 

  Marie Barone : Another sex game? Didn't you have enough with that other sex game you and Robert used to play all the time when you were kids?

  Ray Barone : What?

  Marie Barone : You know, the one with all the colored dots...

  Ray Barone : Twister?

  Marie Barone : Don't think I didn't know what you were doing in the basement.

  Ray Barone : I played with Robert.

• Debra Barone : [They are playing the game. It's Debra's turn. She reads off the board]  Kiss your partner as if they are about to go off to war.

  [She kisses him passionatly for about ten seconds and then stops. After a slight pause Ray pushes her down on the bed and climbs on top of her] 

  Debra Barone : Ray!

  Ray Barone : Come on! I'm going off to war... I could be dead tomorrow!

  Debra Barone : Would you just roll the dice!

  Ray Barone : [He rolls and moves his piece]  Tell your partner something they do not know.

  Ray Barone : [He looks at Debra and then pushes her back onto the bed]  I'm back from the war!

  Debra Barone : Ray! Come on! Do you want to play or not! Take the question seriously!

  Ray Barone : All right okay. This afternoon on my way home from getting the game I stopped and got a chili dog.

  [He puckers up his lips expecting a kiss] 

• Debra Barone : Oh, God, I'm exhausted. Ohh! I could fall asleep right here.

  Ray Barone : All right, okay. I get it.

  Debra Barone : Get what?

  Ray Barone : You don't got to do the whole "I'm tired" show. Don't worry. I will not be bothering you this evening.

  Debra Barone : Wait a minute. You think this is an act so I won't have to have sex with you?

  Ray Barone : Not much of an act. You could jazz it up with a song or two. And-and by the way, I wasn't gonna do anything later anyway, okay, so you don't got to insult me with your preemptive strike.

  Debra Barone : You're nuts.

  Ray Barone : Admit it. You came in here to tell me you were tired so I would leave you alone later.

  Debra Barone : I did not! Why can't you admit it? Look, you're tired, right? You had a long day. So, what's the last thing you would want to do later?

  Debra Barone : Well, you might be right about that.

  Ray Barone : Huh, see? I know. I know when people don't want to have sex with me. You're talkin' to an expert.

  Debra Barone : Okay, so let me ask you this how come you're only picking up that "I'm tired" means "no sex tonight"? How come "I'm tired" doesn't also mean, "Gee, I could really use some help in the kitchen with all those dishes"?

  Ray Barone : What am I, a mind reader?