Three's Company (TV Series)

Janet's Promotion (1977)

Suzanne Somers: Chrissy Snow

Quotes 

• Chloe : I can't remember the last time a guy looked into my eyes. They could be hard boiled eggs for all they care.

  Chrissy Snow : Oh, you have lovely eyes. Right, Jack?

  Jack Tripper : Sure, I noticed your eggs, I mean eyes...

• Chrissy Snow : Oh, Janet, I am so sorry you didn't get the job.

  Janet Wood : Thank you, Chrissy. You know, when I first started high school I had absolutely no figure at all. I kept praying I would blossom.

  [wipes tears out of her eyes] 

  Janet Wood : One day... one day the teacher asked the class to locate the great American flatlands, and

  [shakes her head] 

  Janet Wood : every single boy in class pointed to me.

  Chrissy Snow : [with all the simpathy in the world]  Oh, boy, you must have died.

  Janet Wood : Woe.

  Chrissy Snow : You know, it is that stupid male attitude we had to grow up with.

  Janet Wood : I know, I know. If we didn't need training bras by the time we were ten, our lives were ruined.

  Chrissy Snow : Why are men so hung up on a big bosom?

  Janet Wood : Because they're all brainwashed. Here, look at this magazine... . There's not an ad in here that doesn't have cleavage. Do you honestly need a blonde in a bikini to sell a sports car?

  [as Chrissy shakes her head, she turns page, chuckles:] 

  Janet Wood : Or a redhead in a wet T-shirt to sell a lawn sprinkler?

  Chrissy Snow : Or look at this one. I mean, is it really necessary to show a woman in her underwear?

  Janet Wood : That's an ad for underwear.

  Chrissy Snow : [makes silly face]  Oh.

• Jack Tripper : Where would all the great women of history be if they thought like that? Look at Joan of Arc and what she accomplished. And Florence Nightingale and Madame Curie.

  Chrissy Snow : And Lucrezia Borgia.

  Janet Wood : She poisoned people.

  Chrissy Snow : Yeah, but she was very good at it.

  Jack Tripper : [puts a piece of cheese into her mouth]  Chew. Don't talk.

• Chrissy Snow : [cheerleading while the others are trying to talk]  Chicka chicka boom! Chicka chicka bah! I don't know the rest of it, so ha ha ha!

  Jack Tripper : [shoves a piece of cheese into her mouth]  Chrissy Chrissy chew chew rah rah rah!

• Chrissy Snow : [to irate landlord]  Oh, hi, Mr. Roper.

  Stanley Roper : Would you two mind not jumping on the ceiling?

  Chrissy Snow : We're not jumping on the ceiling. We're jumping on the floor.

  Stanley Roper : Well, your floor happens to be over my ceiling. And my ceiling is over my head. So when you are jumping on your floor, you're jumping on my head!