- Sledge Hammer: Captain Trunk has been like a second-hand father to Raker for years. 'How sharper than a serpent's tooth is an ungrateful punk.'
- Dori: Oh, Sledge, you don't honestly believe the networks are trying to turn people into mindless automotons, do you?
- Sledge Hammer: Haven't you ever seen Matlock?
- Dori: Well, it looks like justice was done.
- Sledge Hammer: It sure was. Those were the ugliest shoes I've ever seen.
- Captain Trunk: Hammer, what happened? Didn't they try to brainwash you?
- Sledge Hammer: That's right, captain, they did. They tried to play on my subconscious. But they forgot one important thing.
- Captain Trunk: What's that?
- Sledge Hammer: I don't have a subconscious.
- Captain Trunk: Hammer, I'm amazed that you were able to hold out against their brainwashing.
- Sledge Hammer: Well, it was easy, sir. I simply thought about one thing.
- Captain Trunk: What was that?
- Sledge Hammer: Well, who's always close to my side? Someone I'm afraid I've been neglecting lately. Someone for whom I've never been able to express my true feelings.
- [Dori blushes and smiles as Hammer looks at her]
- Sledge Hammer: Someone who's beautiful. Sleek. Attractive. I think it's obvious who I'm talking about, sir.
- Dori: Oh, Sledge, stop!
- Sledge Hammer: [Pulls out gun] My gun.
- Captain Trunk: Hammer, you are a truly sensitive guy.
- Sledge Hammer: I never thought you'd know that.
- Narrator in opening sequence: The following season of Sledge Hammer! takes place five years before that nuclear explosion. Thank you.
- Landon Smartikoff: Ultimately, man and TV will combine to form a newer, higher being. Yes, a super race! Smarter, brighter, new and improved.
- [Rests his hand upon a TV set]
- Landon Smartikoff: And it will all start here, and with those who watch it. Yes, the rulers of *tomorrow* sit in front of the TV *today*.
- [while trying to brainwash Sledge]
- Landon Smartikoff: This is impossible! This man is experiencing every form of violence known to man... and he's loving it!