The Simpsons (TV Series)

A Star Is Burns (1995)

Julie Kavner: Marge Simpson, Patty Bouvier, Selma Bouvier

Quotes 

• Lisa : I like him. He's smart, he's sensitive, he's clearly not obsessed with his physical appearance...

  Homer : [walking by]  My ears are burning.

  Lisa : Uh, I wasn't talking about you, Dad.

  Homer : No, my ears are really burning. I wanted to see inside so I lit a Q-Tip.

  Marge : Mmm...

• Marge : Well, it was a lovely festival. The best movie won, and Mr. Burns found there are some awards that can't be bought.

  Rainer Wolfcastle : ["Six months later"]  And the Oscar goes to...

  Montgomery Burns : Oh, I've got to win this one! I bribed everyone in Hollywood.

  Rainer Wolfcastle : ...George C. Scott in "Man Getting Hit By Football".

  [everyone applauds; Burns steams. A screen shows George C. Scott getting hit in the groin by a football] 

  George C. Scott : [doubling over]  Aargh! My groin!

  [falls to the ground, moaning] 

• Homer : [after watching a Jewish parody of "Can't Touch This"]  Marge are we Jewish?

  Marge : No.

  Homer : Woo hoo! Oh boy!

  [Takes out a roast pig and starts to eat it] 

• Marge : Did you know that there are over 600 film critics on TV, and Leonard Maltin is the best looking of them all?

  Lisa : Ew!

• Homer : Marge, do you respect my intelligence?

  Marge : [long pause]  Yes.

  Homer : Okay.

  [goes to bed, gets up] 

  Homer : Wait a minute... why did it take you so long to say yes?

  Marge : [long pause]  No reason.

  Homer : Okay.

  [goes to bed, gets up] 

  Homer : Wait a minute... are you humoring me?

  Marge : [long pause]  Yes.

  Homer : Okay.

  [goes to bed, gets up] 

  Homer : Wait a minute... that's bad!

• Marge : I'm Marge Simpsons and I have an idea.

  Most of People at the Meeting : Ohhh...

  [in frustration] 

  'Marge is gonna say something... ' : Marge is gonna say something.

  [in a low voice] 

• Patty Bouvier : The easiest way to be popular is by leeching off the popularity of others.

  Selma Bouvier : So we propose changing the name of Springfield to Seinfeld.