Scrubs (TV Series)
My Dirty Secret (2003)
Ken Jenkins: Dr. Bob Kelso
Quotes
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Dr. Doug Murphy : Hey, Dr. Kelso, none of my patients have died today.
Dr. Bob Kelso : Really? Mr. Ferguson's corpse begs to differ.
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Dr. Bob Kelso : Dr. Murphy, how about you start us off by describing the medical condition of your patient Mr. Eronson here.
Dr. Doug Murphy : [smugly] He's got hypertrophic cardiomyopathy with severe secondary pulmonary hypertension.
Dr. Bob Kelso : [Kelso picks up Eronson's wrist and lets it drop to the bed] Wrong. He's dead.
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Dr. Elliot Reid : Mr. Murdock was admitted with a COPD exacerbation; he responded well to antibiotics and bronchial dilators but he did develop a rash on his, um... private area.
Dr. Bob Kelso : Sorry, on his what?
Dr. Elliot Reid : His peepers.
Dr. Bob Kelso : Excuse me?
Dr. Elliot Reid : His schwing-schwong.
Dr. Bob Kelso : Dr. Reid, it's bad enough you run out on a patient in the middle of a pelvic exam. But you are a doctor, and you need to be able to say simple clinical words like "penis," or "vagina," or "anal."
Dr. Elliot Reid : "Anal" is not a dirty word, sir.
Dr. Bob Kelso : Tell that to my wife.