This Valentine's Day episode's guest is the Monkees' Davy Jones, who joins Judy Carne for Sock It To Me. JoAnne Worley sings Secret Love and has ironing board trouble. The Flying Fickle Finger of Fate trophy goes to Youngstown, Ohio voters. Henry Gibson recites his rhinoceros poem. Arte Johnson does bird calls and fights with his chest of drawers. Dan Rowan and Dick Martin portray Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson to solve a case. The female regulars dress as brunette gospel singers to introduce News of the Past, Present, and Future. Stranger than Truth profiles a child prodigy. Alan Sues and J. J. Barry play convicts. Dave Madden laments the woes of being a policeman. Goldie Hawn and Chelsea Brown are among those dressing as Playboy Bunnies. Discovery of the Week is percussionist Red Dog Weber. Two friends lunch together and argue over who is paying the check. Nipsey Russell also appears.
—Maisie Fleckum