- Jim Rockford: This is Jim Rockford. At the tone leave your name and address, I'll get back to you.
- Phil: [Beeep and really staticky phone line comes on] Jimmy, it's Phil in Puerto Rico. This is really important! Talk to
- [static]
- Phil: He'll pay twenty thousand dollars
- [more static]
- Phil: He'll only do
- [static, static and nothing but static]
- Phil: ...
- Joseph 'Rocky' Rockford: Hey, these potatoes real?
- Jim Rockford: What do you mean "real"?
- Joseph 'Rocky' Rockford: Well you know I don't like those ready-made potatoes, all cold and frozen.
- Jim Rockford: The Galloping Gourmet... just eat, will ya?
- Jim Rockford: I'm the one who spent the night on the county, Beth!
- Beth Davenport: And everybody has apologized. Now will you listen to me?
- Joseph 'Rocky' Rockford: Warren Weeks? That don't seem possible.
- Jim Rockford: Yeah well, you always were a sucker for a short haircut.
- Lt. Doug Chapman: You got a big, smart mouth with contempt for the law and the people who try to enforce it!
- Jim Rockford: Not all of them, lieutenant.