- [after they found out that Hunter fucked a cop they suspect of murder]
- Michael: This guy could've killed you.
- James 'Hunter' Montgomery: They all could.
- Michael: Well, if you know that Then why do you do it?
- James 'Hunter' Montgomery: I have low self-esteem. I was sexualized at too early an age. It's exciting, fun and a great way to make non-reportable income.
- Michael: I would like an honest answer, smart-Ass.
- Brian Kinney: He just gave you one.
- [Hunter mistakes Justin for a hooker]
- James 'Hunter' Montgomery: What are you bothering with that for? How much is he charging you?
- Brian Kinney: [looking over at Justin] A hundred bucks?
- Justin Taylor: Mhm. He refuses to pay though.
- James 'Hunter' Montgomery: I don't blame him! I wouldn't give you 10 bucks!
- Brian Kinney: [pushing Hunter out the door] Okay, I think it's time someone was tucked into bed! And not mine!
- [Michael, Ben and Hunter just spoke to a high-school principal about Hunter returning to school]
- Professor Ben Bruckner: At least now we finally get to know all about you.
- Michael: Name?
- James 'Hunter' Montgomery: Hunter.
- Michael: Hunter what?
- James 'Hunter' Montgomery: Just hunter.
- Michael: You think you're an aging rock diva?
- James 'Hunter' Montgomery: Last names tend to get in the way of my work.
- Professor Ben Bruckner: Wait, from now on, the only work you're doing is homework. Out with it.
- James 'Hunter' Montgomery: James Hunter Montgomery.
- Michael: Nice to meet you, jimmy.
- James 'Hunter' Montgomery: Shut up.
- Professor Ben Bruckner: When were you born?
- James 'Hunter' Montgomery: I wasn't born. My mother was too drunk to give birth, So i was delivered, 16 glorious years ago last tuesday.
- Michael: Last tuesday? You had a birthday last week and you didn't tell us?
- Professor Ben Bruckner: We could've done something to celebrate.
- James 'Hunter' Montgomery: Like blow out a candle? I blew three tricks that day. Made 150 bucks. That's what I call celebrating.
- Detective Carl Horvath: What the hell is that?
- Brian Kinney: Uh, this newfangled contraption is called a "condom". You wanted hard evidence. It doesn't get much harder.
- Debbie Novotny: Detectiv Horvarth, out of all the places in greater pittsburgh, what brings you to our humble little establishment?
- Detective Carl Horvath: I have a date.
- [Brian enters]
- Detective Carl Horvath: And here he is.
- Debbie Novotny: What, did you convert him?
- Brian Kinney: Coffee, Deb, please
- Detective Carl Horvath: You were right.
- Brian Kinney: Those are my three favourite words after "nine inches cut"
- Debbie Novotny: About what?
- Brian Kinney: Um, the cream.
- Debbie Novotny: What, did it turn?
- Detective Carl Horvath: It matches that found in Jason Kemp's rectum.
- Debbie Novotny: For your information, i just poured it.
- Detective Carl Horvath: I'm referring to a sperm sample from an officer tThis kid hunter said he saw with the victim.
- Michael: Still searching for that exquisite turn of phrase that in five words or less expresses the essence of what your character's feeling?
- Professor Ben Bruckner: I'm frustrated as shit.
- Michael: Only four, congratulations.
- Emmett: You were right. I am just a silly faggot.
- Melanie Marcus: No. You stood beside your partner, No matter what anyone said. And that makes you a very loyal, very brave faggot.