- [first lines]
- Victor Meldrew: Who do you reckon did it, then?
- Margaret Meldrew: His nephew Basil.
- Victor Meldrew: Why?
- Margaret Meldrew: Because, when they found the old man's body in the herb garden, that's what he was clutching in his hand, a piece of basil.
- Victor Meldrew: Haaaah. Lucky he wasn't killed by his uncle *Dick*.
- [last lines]
- Victor Meldrew: What would make an old man like that suddenly part with all the money he's got in the world?