- [discussing plea deals before session]
- Dan Fielding: Mackinaw.
- Christine Sullivan: Now this guy, he's a family man. Do you have to charge him with indecent exposure?
- Dan Fielding: A guy shows up at a public beach wearing nothing but a hot dog bun and relish, what am I supposed to charge him with?
- Christine Sullivan: Vending without a license?
- Ed Druthers: So how does a man get lost in the system for 41 hours?
- Court Clerk MacIntosh 'Mac' Robinson: In this case, Borelli was arrested at the 33rd Precinct. Some doofus put him on a bus to the women's jail instead of here.
- [cut to Druthers interviewing Borelli]
- Ed Druthers: You were sent to a women's detention center, de-loused in jail with 300 women. Why didn't you say anything?
- Mr. Borelli: [shrugs] Would you?
- Dan Fielding: Mrs. Quinn here attacked Miss Walsh after catching her and Mr. Quinn in flagrante delicto.
- Laurie Quinn: What are you talking about? He was in the sack with her. Slut!
- Lucy Walsh: Shrew!
- Laurie Quinn: Tart! Vixen!
- Lucy Walsh: Wench!
- Laurie Quinn: Jezebel!
- Harry Stone: Ladies, ladies, ladies, ladies. Now that we have exhausted every word in the 'bitch' family...
- Nostradamus 'Bull' Shannon: Actually, sir, they left out strumpet, slattern, meretrix, harlot, and demimonde.
- Dan Fielding: Your Honor, this is the second time the defendant has been tried for robbing the Manhattan Butcher Shop.
- Harry Stone: So we *meat* again. Looks like someone hasn't *loined* his lesson. Well, apparently he doesn't realize what's at *steak* here.
- Harry Stone: [as the courtroom clears unamused] Hey, where you going? This is *prime* stuff.