- Fran Sheffield: You know, Miss Babcock, for your information, I just found out: I'm not stupid. I'm *sexy*.
- Chastity Claire 'C.C.' Babcock: Nanny Fine, don't sell yourself short. You're both!
- Fran Sheffield: Well, I am smart enough to know I have just been insulted, and sexy enough *not* to care!
- Chastity Claire 'C.C.' Babcock: I'm being taken out tonight.
- Niles: Oh, in that case, I'll open the drapes and give the gunman a cleaner shot.
- Niles: [C.C. walks to a mirror and looks in it] Mirror mirror on the wall, why must I look like Charles de Gaulle?
- Dean Sterrett: I happen to be the Chair of my department.
- Fran Sheffield: Oh?! Do you do "Gypsies, Tramps and Thieves"?