- Sylvia Fine: [upon entering the Sheffield kitchen] Surprise! I got a pecan coffee cake.
- Fran Fine: What's the surprise, Ma: you brought it all the way here and it arrived whole?
- [Fran and her cousin Sheila are lamenting their single status, especially after Yetta announces she just got engaged]
- Fran Fine: [about Yetta] What does she have that we don't?
- Cousin Sheila: Removable teeth?
- Brighton Sheffield: [about Niles] He's making me hold his sweaty ankles and he's wearing these really baggy shorts. Are you getting the picture here?