- Sue Ann Nivens: Mary, dear - do you have any idea what happens when you let Veal Prince Orloff sit in an oven too long?
- Mary Richards: No, what?
- Sue Ann Nivens: He dies.
- Sue Ann Nivens: [after dumping out a dessert that wasn't baked] Oh, sh... urely that isn't how a Strawberry Swirl is supposed to look.
- Rhoda Morgenstern: Mary, I thought you knew. Your parties are, uh, disasters. I mean, I thought you knew. How could you not know that?
- Mary Richards: Yes, I know. Okay. I know. I knew. I just didn't know that anyone else knew.
- Lou Grant: It's not that I don't have a good time at your parties, Mary. I've had some of the worst times in my life. Agony.
- Lou Grant: Ted, why are you always doing stuff like showing up in places where you weren't invited with a pint of sherbet?
- Murray Slaughter: Be fair Lou, the sherbet's a new touch.
- Sue Ann Nivens: What can I do for you?
- Mary Richards: Well gee, it's not really important, Sue Ann. I can come back another time.
- Sue Ann Nivens: Oh nonsense. I'll be done chewing out the crew in two shakes of a lamb's tail.
- Mary Richards: Oh Ted, won't you try to understand. There will be other parties.
- Ted Baxter: I'll give you $20.