M*A*S*H (TV Series)
The Incubator (1973)
Ted Gehring: Major Arnold Morris
Photos
Quotes
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Major Morris : You guys! Rich young draftee doctors all dressed up like drum majorettes.
Hawkeye : Rich? Some of my patients pay me in kittens!
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Major Morris : Our clerk says you want an incubator. No dice.
Hawkeye : Yeah, but you've got three.
Major Morris : That's right. If I give one away, I'll only have two.
Trapper : What's wrong with two?
Major Morris : Two is not as good as three.
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Major Morris : You know, I think I know how we can solve this problem. Why don't you guys just salute and get the hell on out of here?
Trapper : Who's your commanding officer?
Major Morris : Colonel Lambert is the commanding officer of this base.
Hawkeye : Where would we find him?
Major Morris : Well, nowhere on the base, that's for sure.
Hawkeye : He's got his own house?
Major Morris : He's got two of 'em, one blonde, one brunette.