Ted Bullpitt: [playing Scrabble, Bruno, Thelma and Greta are waiting for him to put a word down on the board, he comes up with a word he thinks will boost his score] I got one! I got one!
Bruno Bertolucci: [seeing Ted put the Scrabble tiles onto the board, suspecting yet another made-up word that doesn't exist in any dictionary] Listen, if you try and put KWOJ down again, I'll personally stick a Valiant badge on the Kingswood.
Ted Bullpitt: [glaring at Bruno] You wouldn't dare!
Bruno Bertolucci: I would.
[curiously]
Bruno Bertolucci: Righto, what've you got?
Ted Bullpitt: [placing tiles on board] There it is. 10 points, and on a Triple Word Score that's uh, 31.
Bruno Bertolucci: [points at the word Ted put on the board] Hang on, hang on.
Ted Bullpitt: [puzzled] What?
Bruno Bertolucci: What the hell's a GURF?
Ted Bullpitt: [eager to get on with the game] Your turn, Thel.
Bruno Bertolucci: Nope, no, the game is now officially stopped until you tell us what a GURF is.
Ted Bullpitt: [looking at Bruno] What, you reckon I don't know?
Bruno Bertolucci: [nods] Yeah.
Ted Bullpitt: Well I do, so there.
[points to Thelma]
Ted Bullpitt: Your turn, Thel.
Greta Bertolucci: [wondering what the made-up word means] Come on, dad, what is it?
Thelma Bullpitt: [intrigued to know as well] Yes Ted what is it? Is it one of those little goblin thingies you get at the BP station?
Greta Bertolucci: [informingly] That's a Smurf mum.
Thelma Bullpitt: [nods approvingly] Oh.
[to Greta]
Thelma Bullpitt: I wouldn't buy BP. All those Smurfs, they clog up the engine.
Greta Bertolucci: No, they don't them in petrol mum.
Thelma Bullpitt: Well they get them in the car somehow Gret, 'cause the man from the NRMA told me that I had one behind the wheel.
Bruno Bertolucci: [frustrated, gesturing to Thelma] Listen, will you knock if off with the Smurfs? We're trying to find out what a GURF is. Now what is it?
Ted Bullpitt: [looking at Bruno] A GURF, pizza-features, is an astronaut's shanghai.
Bruno Bertolucci: [scoffs] Oh, come on, are you asking us to believe that Neil Armstrong jumped out of the Lunar Module with a shanghai in his back pocket?
Ted Bullpitt: Yeah, course he did.
Bruno Bertolucci: What did he want with a shanghai?
Ted Bullpitt: To knock off magpies.
Bruno Bertolucci: There are no magpies on the moon.
Ted Bullpitt: Been there, have you?
Bruno Bertolucci: No.
Ted Bullpitt: Well how would you know?
[grumbling]
Ted Bullpitt: Bloody magpies they're everywhere.
[looking at Bruno]
Ted Bullpitt: Probably pooped all over the Apollo like they poop all over the Kingswood!