- Hank Hill: Made in American can not be a marketing gimmick, like "dolphin safe". It's gotta stand for something.
- Hank Hill: What are you laughing at?
- Professor John Lerner: It's funny, isn't it? Sounds like I could've scored with your wife for the price of a fake bracelet.
- Hank Hill: What?
- [shoves Lerner into the pit]
- Bobby Hill: We learned in school you don't call them Indians anymore; you call them Native Americans. It's like saying "same sex partner" instead of...
- Hank Hill, Peggy Hill: Bobby!