Keeping Up Appearances (TV Series)

The Mayor's Fancy Dress Ball (1995)

Clive Swift: Richard

Quotes 

• Richard : Hyacinth, if you are going as Marie Antoinette...

  Hyacinth : Well, I am. I have my heart set on Marie Antoinette.

  Richard : Maybe I could go as the executioner.

  Hyacinth : Oh, that's a good idea.

  Richard : Well, it has a certain appeal, I agree.

• Hyacinth : Do be careful what you choose for yourself. I don't want you in tights, Richard. I get very embarrassed in front of the neighbours when you're in tights.

  Richard : When have I ever been in tights?

  Hyacinth : The year you were Robin Hood.

  Richard : *I* was Friar Tuck; *you* were Robin Hood.

  Hyacinth : Are you sure?

  Richard : Don't you remember? Sheridan became ill because he couldn't be Maid Marian.

  Hyacinth : Oh yes, I do remember. Poor Sheridan. He broke out in spots. Only in the nicest places, of course.

• [first lines] 

  Hyacinth : Richard!

  Richard : I know that voice.

  Hyacinth : Do you remember the Winslows?

  Richard : No.

  Hyacinth : Well, they've overlooked something. They came to one of my candlelight suppers, and they've never invited us back. I can't understand it.

  Richard : I think I can.

  Hyacinth : It must be an oversight. They're not the kind of people who'd commit a breach of manners. You must ring them for a chat and drop a hint, Richard.

  Richard : Me!

  Hyacinth : Well, I'd do it myself, only I'm not the sort of person who goes fishing for invitations.

  Richard : Well, I can't do that!

  Hyacinth : Good! That's settled then.