Homicide: Life on the Street (TV Series)

The Documentary (1997)

Richard Belzer: Detective John Munch

Photos 

Quotes 

• Det. Mike Kellerman : [Kellerman is seen on a VHS tape posing in front of his boat proudly]  You think I'm a sociopath?

  J.H. Brodie : Well, not like Munch...

  [Detective Munch is seen on the VHS tape lying on the floor of his apartment, dipping a children's rocket Popsicle into a glass of beer, going right to town on the Popsicle and drinking all the beer at once] 

  Det. John Munch : [surprised]  I didn't know doing that looked so weird...

• Det. Tim Bayliss : You have got the absolute right to remain silent!

  Det. Frank Pembleton : Of course you do. You're a criminal. Criminals always have the right to remain silent.

  Det. Meldrick Lewis : We're talking about sacred freedoms here, notably your Fifth Amendment protection against self incrimination. Hey, if it was good enough for Ollie North and Mark Fuhrman, who in the hell are you to incriminate yourself at the first opportunity?

  Det. John Munch : Get it straight, a police detective being paid government money to put you in prison is explaining your right to shut up.

• Det. Tim Bayliss : You see, you have the right to talk to an attorney before answering any questions or during any questioning.

  Det. John Munch : Now, the man who wants to arrest you for violating the peace and dignity of the great state of Maryland has informed you that you may talk to an expert, an attorney. Who's read the relevant code, or at least gotten his hands on some Cliff's Notes.

  Det. Meldrick Lewis : And let's face it pal. You just carved up some drunk behind a Dundalk Avenue bar or bludgeoned your wife to death with a pick axe, that don't make you a brain surgeon. You're gonna need the help of an expert! Believe me, take whatever help you can get!

• Det. Sgt. Kay Howard : The detective wants you to know, and we've been doing this a lot longer than you, so you can take our word for it. Your rights to counsel... aren't all they're cracked up to be.

  Det. Frank Pembleton : Once you up and cal for that lawyer, son, there ain't a damn thing we can do for you! No sir, your good friends in the Homicide Unit are gonna have to lock you all alone in this room. And the next authority figure to scan your case will be a no-nonsense prosecutor from the Violent Crimes Unit, with the official title of Assistant States Attorney for the City of Baltimore.

  Det. John Munch : And God help you then, cause a ruthless blood-sucker like that'll have an O'Donnell Heights motorhead like yourself halfway to the gas chamber before you can get three words out.

  Det. Mike Kellerman : Your best bet is to speak up. Speak up now.

• Det. Frank Pembleton : Hey Hey Hey!

  Det. Mike Kellerman : Whoa! You guys solve your case?

  Det. Frank Pembleton : Yep

  Det. Tim Bayliss : Nope

  Det. Mike Kellerman : Well, which is it?

  Det. Frank Pembleton : Tim's tormented again, by the "why"

  Det. John Munch : Tim's always tormented by the "why". I got a why questions for you, Bayliss. Why do you always need to know the "why"?

  Det. Frank Pembleton : Well, we got our "why". The husband's having an affair, he doesn't want the wife to know. The neighbors are snooping around, so he shoots them down. Bada Bing!

  Det. Tim Bayliss : There's more to it, Frank. I think that we should go talk to Mrs. Jackson.

  Det. Frank Pembleton : Mrs. Jackson is in a Glen Burney nursing home. You want to talk to her about her husband's extra-marital affairs? You got your confession, leave the woman alone.

  Det. Meldrick Lewis : You know what your problem is, Timmy?

  Det. Tim Bayliss : I don't got a problem.

  Det. Meldrick Lewis : You let things haunt you.

  Det. Tim Bayliss : No I don't! And I know what you're thinkin'.

  Det. John Munch : What are we thinking?

  Det. Tim Bayliss : Adena Watson?

  Det. John Munch : That's what I'm thinking

  [Turns to Lewis] 

  Det. John Munch : Is that what you're thinkin'?

  Det. Meldrick Lewis : That's exactly what I'm thinking!