- Harvey Birdman: My client, a private investigator.
- Mentok: Colloquially known as...?
- Harvey Birdman: Uhhh... a P.I.? Gumshoe?
- Inch-High, Private Eye: He wants you to say "dick".
- Mentok: Which would make you an...?
- Inch-High, Private Eye: [sighs] Inch-high dick.
- Inch-High, Private Eye: [has just been enlarged to a normal-sized human being] Be right back!
- Inch-High, Private Eye: [is now in line at an amusement park where it says "you must be this tall to ride"] Again.
- Amusement park worker: Please step onto the ride, sir.
- Inch-High, Private Eye: I'm sorry, what?
- Amusement park worker: Get on the ride, sir.
- Inch-High, Private Eye: Again.