Growing Pains (TV Series)

Who's Zoomin' Who? (1987)

Kirk Cameron: Mike Seaver

Quotes 

• [Ben and Mike are having milk and cake and discussing Carol's latest romance] 

  Ben Seaver : So, Carol's going steady with Bobby again?

  Mike Seaver : Yeah, y'know it's really sad. Look, Ben, take it from me: never, *ever* get into a long-term relationship with a girl, because then they start controllin' ya, and that means the end of fun as you know it.

  Ben Seaver : So you're staying guys should control girls or our lives will be miserable.

  Mike Seaver : Exact- . . .

  [suddenly, Mike notices Mom listening from the hallway behind Ben] 

  Mike Seaver : . . . -ly, what do you mean by that, Ben? Come on, now, haven't you heard a word I've been sayin'? Look, women should be in control.

  Ben Seaver : *What?*

  Mike Seaver : Oh, yes, they're smarter, more sensible, and more responsible. Look, think of Mom, a'right? Now, she's the real head of this family, and I, for one, couldn't be happier.

  [Mom realizes what Mike is doing, and goes on her way down the hall, satisfied] 

  Ben Seaver : So you're saying women should be in control.

  Mike Seaver : [now that Mom is gone]  No! How many times do I have to explain this to you?