The Golden Girls (TV Series)

Joust Between Friends (1986)

Bea Arthur: Dorothy Zbornak

Photos 

Quotes 

• Dorothy Petrillo Zbornak : I've had it. I've just had it. In the past few days, I have been turned down for every available part-time job in Dade County that didn't involve selling cocaine.

  Blanche Devereaux : Oh, Dorothy, it's just so unfair. They shouldn't be allowed to do this to a fine teacher like you.

  Dorothy Petrillo Zbornak : Well, it's part of the experimental year-round school system. Every teacher is required to take a ten-week leave, and my ten weeks are now.

  Sophia Petrillo : This wouldn't have happened if you'd taken the job I wanted you to take.

  Dorothy Petrillo Zbornak : Ma, you wanted me to be a nun.

  Sophia Petrillo : Right. It's steady work, they supply the uniform, and you're married to God. At least he's home every night.

• Andrew Allen : [when Sophia comes to the museum to bring Dorothy her lunch, the Director greets her, and lays it on pretty thick]  Hellooooo. And who do we have here?

  Dorothy Petrillo Zbornak : This is my mother, Mrs Sophia Petrillo. Ma, this is my boss, Mr Allen.

  Andrew Allen : [speaking slowly and loudly, as if patronizing her advanced age]  Pleased to meet you, Mrs Petrillo. What brings you to our humble home?

  Sophia Petrillo : [turns to Blanche, covering her mouth so Mr Allen won't hear]  Is he gay?

  Dorothy Petrillo Zbornak : Uhhh, come on, honey, I'll walk you to the car.

  Andrew Allen : Goodbye, Mrs Petrillo. Sorry you didn't have an opportunity to experience our museum. I'd love for you to see my most prized acquisition: a magnificent pair of Gauguins.

  Sophia Petrillo : [offended and outraged]  What are you, a pervert? I was married for 45 years, I never even saw my husband's Gauguins.

• Dorothy Petrillo Zbornak : [Rose rescues a stray dog and intends to keep him in her room; suddenly, Dorothy hears him barking]  What was that?

  Blanche Devereaux : Rose brought a dog home from the supermarket.

  Dorothy Petrillo Zbornak : What, couldn't she just get stew meat like she usually does?