Get Smart (TV Series)
The Only Way to Die (1966)
Don Adams: Maxwell Smart
Photos
Quotes
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Maxwell Smart : You might as well hand over that gun, Blaster, because this yacht happens to be surrounded by the seventh fleet.
The Blaster : I find that hard to believe.
Maxwell Smart : Would you believe the sixth fleet?
The Blaster : I don't think so.
Maxwell Smart : How about a school of angry flounder?
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Maxwell Smart : What did you bring me today, Chief?
Chief : Corned beef from Irving's delicatessen.
[turns to leave]
Maxwell Smart : Chief?
Chief : Hm?
Maxwell Smart : I don't care what happens to me, but somehow, some place, some time I'm going to put that man behind bars.
Chief : The Blaster.
Maxwell Smart : No, Irving. This corned beef is terrible.
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Agent 13 : I'm sitting in a mailbox and you're telling me I don't know what it's like to be cooped up in a small room? I'd love to be cooped up in a small room. I'd give anything to to be cooped up in something as big as a small room.
Maxwell Smart : Take it easy, 13, take it easy.
Agent 13 : Every assignment I get I'm always locked up in something small. I'm always in a mailbox or a scale or a locker or a grandfathers clock or a tree - you know what happened when I was stationed in that tree at the rubber plantation place?
Maxwell Smart : What?
Agent 13 : I was tapped! Try that some time! Try standing up all night with a spigot in your stomach!
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Maxwell Smart : [Max finds the mailbox 13 was hiding in to be empty] He's been mailed!