- Beck: [during a concert] That song doesn't usually last three hours, but we got into a serious thing... and then I forgot how it ended.
- Bender: [singing] Fry crack corn, and I don't care / Leela crack corn, I still don't care / Bender crack corn, and he is great / Take that, you stupid corn!
- [looking over an old Hippy Volkswagen bus]
- Amy Wong: This speedometer only goes up to 80. This thing can't go faster than 80,000 miles an hour?
- Fry: No, it can't. But it's got a driver's side floor and an eight-track player with genuine mono sound.
- Professor Hubert Farnsworth: Where's the device that lets to speed up or slow down the passage of time?
- Fry: [pulls out a bong] Under the seat.
- Patchcord Adams: So long. Get well soon.
- [looks at Bender's chart]
- Patchcord Adams: Whoa! Well, so long, anyway.
- Bend-Aid Announcer: Ladies and gentlehippies, put your filthy hands together for the art-house stylings of Cylon and Garfunkel!
- Art Garfunkel's Descendant: Here's a song that was beautiful when performed by my ancestor Artie.
- Art Garfunkel's Descendant: [singing] Are you coming to Scarborough Fair?
- Cylon: [mechanical monotone] Parsley, sage, rosemary and thyme.
- Beck: Bender, that was the best 40 minute washboard solo I've ever heard, and the parts when I was awake blew my mind.
- Bender: You know, when I first got broken, I thought my life was over. But look at me now.
- [starts counting with his fingers]
- Bender: I've got fame, money, groupies, and it's all thanks to being completely immobilized.
- [stands up]
- Bender: That's why I'll be proud to go up on stage tomorrow and say, "Look at me, world! I am a broken robot!"
- Fry: Bender, you can move! You're cured!
- Bender: Oh, crap! It's a miracle!
- Bender: I was a hero to broken robots 'cause I was one of them, but how can I sing about being damaged if I'm not? That's like Christina Aguilera singing Spanish. Ooh, wait! That's it! I'll fake it!
- Fry: She just needs some gas.
- Professor Hubert Farnsworth: Wrong again, idiot. There is no gas. Petroleum preserves went dry in 2038.
- Leela: Gas was an environmental disaster, anyway. Now we use alternative fuels.
- Fry: Like what?
- Leela: Whale oil.
- Patchcord Adams: Did you hear they're using Windows 3000 as a jailer?
- Fry: No. Why?
- Patchcord Adams: 'Cause it always locks up.
- [Others laugh weakly]
- Bender: For the love of God, somebody kick his ass!
- Patchcord Adams: [offers Bender a balloon animal] Here, take it. What's the matter? Can't move your arms?
- Bender: Obviously not, or I'd be strangling you right now.
- Hick: Get out of here, you moneyless hippies!
- Horrible Gelatinous Blob: Yeah, get out of here! We don't like your type 'round these parts.
- [shows pictures of weird aliens]
- Horrible Gelatinous Blob: These are the types we like.
- Fry: Wow, I forgot about TV. Living free on the road, you realize how much better life is without it. Well, let's see what's on.
- Fry: Get your love beads here! You can't journey to the center of your mind without love beads!
- Hippie #1: Wow, look at all the colors. These'll go great with my soul.
- Dr. Zoidberg: Glad you like them. I've been making fine jewelry for years, apparently.
- Hippie #2: I'll trade you a bad poem!
- Bender: Oh, no! I forgot this is a hoverbridge!
- Turanga Leela: And I forgot this isn't a hovercar!
- Fry: Is any of that a problem?
- Dr. Zoidberg: Not if you've lived a life without regret!
- Dr. Zoidberg: [the gang is doing laundry] Bad news, friends. My shell ran.
- [All the clothes are covered in pink swirls]
- Amy Wong: Zoidberg, you idiot! My outfit! It's... It's...
- Turanga Leela: Kinda cool.
- Fry: Yeah, I like it.
- Amy Wong: Me too, now that I'm used to it.
- Dr. Zoidberg: Then it was all on purpose! You're lucky to have Zoidberg as a friend. But cross me and I'll turn on you like that!
- Amy Wong: [Zoidberg is hacking into a tissue] You better not do that at the concert.
- Dr. Zoidberg: I can't stop. When I eat too much dirt I get stuff in my throat.
- Amy Wong: You are so disgusting! I...
- [Gasps as she sees that Zoidberg is hacking up blue pearls; she takes a handful]
- Amy Wong: They're beautiful!
- Dr. Zoidberg: Eww, you're touching them!
- Turanga Leela: I've never seen such beautiful pearls. Dr. Zoidberg, you're amazing!
- Dr. Zoidberg: I am? At last, recognition!