Friends (TV Series)

The One with Ross's Inappropriate Song (2002)

Jennifer Aniston: Rachel Green

Quotes 

• Rachel Greene : Take it from me. Mothers love me. Ross' mom actually said that I'm like the daughter that she never had.

  Monica Geller-Bing : She said WHAT?

  Phoebe Buffay : That she's like the daughter that she never had. Listen.

  [Monica looks at Phoebe angrily] 

• Dr. Ross Geller : I sang, or rapped, "Baby Got Back"?

  Rachel Greene : You what? So you sang, to our baby daughter, a song about a guy who likes to have sex with women with giant asses?

• Rachel Greene : Is it only offensive, novelty rap? Or just rap in general? Because Mommy can rap.

  [starts bopping her fists] 

  Rachel Greene : "My name is Mommy, and I'm here to say / That all the babies are..." Oh, I can't rap.

• Phoebe : Hi.

  Monica , Rachel : Hey!

  Phoebe : Listen - you have to help me pick a dress, 'cause I'm meeting Mike's parents tonight!

  Monica : Wow - the boyfriend's parents; that's a big step.

  Phoebe : [sarcastically]  Really? That hadn't occurred to me.

  Monica : Sweetie, they're gonna love you. Just be yourself.

  Phoebe : They live on the Upper East Side on Park Avenue!

  Rachel : Oh, yeah - she can't be herself...

  Phoebe : Alright - so, which dress?

  [shows them two dresses] 

  Phoebe : [they don't comment for a few seconds]  ... You can say neither.

  Monica , Rachel : Oh, god - neither!

  Monica : I'm sorry, honey - we're gonna take you shopping; it's gonna be fine.

  Rachel : Yeah, totally - you are in such good hands, and I am so good with meeting parents. With the father, you know, you wanna flirt a little bit - but not in a gross way. Just kind of, like, "Oh, Mr. Pinser! I can see where Wallace gets his good looks from."

  Monica : You went out with Wallace Pinser?

  Rachel : Ah, he took the SATs for me.

  Monica : I knew you didn't get a 1400!

  Rachel : [scoffs]  Well, duh!