- Vivian Banks: Janice, why didn't you tell anyone about Frank?
- Janice: I guess I was hoping no one would notice?
- Aunt Helen: Girl, who did you think you were bringing him home to? Stevie Wonder?
- Bobby: [about the family sleeping arrangements] I wanna sleep with Carlton.
- Carlton Banks: I always dreamt when I heard those words, it would be Paula Abdul saying them.
- Carlton Banks: [to Will] I have compiled a special melody of songs. Give a listen:
- [sings]
- Carlton Banks: Ebony and ivory, live together in perfect harmony, because the world is black, the world is white, it turns by day and then by night, since she's got jungle fever, he's got jungle fever, they've got jungle fever, we're in love!
- [stops singing]
- Carlton Banks: What do you think?
- William 'Will' Smith: I think you were deprived of oxygen at birth.
- Hilary Banks: Do I have to do everything myself?
- Geoffrey: The day you do everything yourself is the day I square-dance naked in the White House front lawn.
- Vy: [about Janice's fiance] Janice, you should've told me he was white!
- Aunt Helen: Oh, no. Clear the table. She's about to blow a gasket.
- Vivian Banks: Well, here were are: the Smith sisters together again
- [to Janice]
- Vivian Banks: the good,
- [to Vy]
- Vivian Banks: , the bad
- [to Helen]
- Vivian Banks: , and...
- Aunt Helen: Don't even think about it.