- John Crichton: [before Crichton gets turned into a statue] Aw, this is not happening. Just feel free to wake me up any time, D'Argo.
- General Ka D'Argo: Well, now, I can only speak truth. And that comes as good and bad news.
- John Crichton: All right, give me the bad news first.
- General Ka D'Argo: The bad news is that you're married and you must endure as a statue for 80 cycles on a strange world.
- John Crichton: What's the good news?
- General Ka D'Argo: Chiana and I are having fantastic sex.
- Lt. Meeklo Braca: You're insane.
- John Crichton: What? You just figured that out? I thought that was common knowledge.