- Carl Moss leaves jail, where he has taken the rap for his evil twin Sterling, and has been declared a model prisoner. Pauline Sneek, his probation officer - and girlfriend - gets him community work teaching youngsters how to lead law-abiding lives. This displeases Sterling, as he needs the young delinquents for his bicycle stealing ring.—mykey accident
- Didn't you kill my brother written by and starring English comedian Alexi Sayle is almost a one man band show. Alexi plays two twin brothers who are rarely on screen at the same time. They both come from the East End of London and are clearly loosely based on the Kray Twins. The show starts with the announcement of the good brother leaving jail early for his good behaviour with a raft of qualifications (14 A Levels, 3 degrees, an award from the academies de Francais for his contribution to cuisine and a Liverpudlian accent - etc), in his own words "whilst I was rotting in that stinking pen I realised that I had a brain like an Apple Macintosh and now I just want to help people. He then sets about helping inner city kids to make the most of themselves. Meanwhile the policeman who "fitted him up" in collusion with his twin brother thinks that its all an act and sets about trying to put him back in jail. His own brother who has remained a mobster running East London likewise wants his brother put (back) away because the kids that work for him are now mending their ways - "bad for business innit".
As well as covering the good twins efforts to reform the local youth, the show also follows the evil twin's scheming, when speaking to his mother:
Evil twin enters the room to find his mother reading The Dictionary.
"wotcha mum, what you doin'?" "compassion, I don't know the meaning of the word"
later mum asks
"How's your father?" "he fine" "I thought I told you to kill im!" "oh yeah, well, I ad im cornered, but he run off" "ohh, well perhaps next time?" "yeah"
The show that then follows is a number of satirical observances upon England at the time. The tearing down of trendy wine bars in the post modernist backlash to provide pubs "Bert! Where's the wine list, where's the pianist?" exclaims the recently released Alexi when he goes back to his local. His girlfriend is a thatcherite social services witch and her father a mad judge who can be found at the local golf course replete in robes hitting the grass with his gravel whilst shouting "bastard grass, bastard grass" alluding to the "mad judges" headlines of the time. A police raid on a group of local youths, who once captured are then invited to a game of Cricket in the new-age-love-a-hoody type of policing that replaced the banging heads of previous years. As the Cricket game continues Alexi Sayles good twin character arrives on a bicycle ("powered by a scotch egg") and exchanges one of the more memorable lines with the chief of police in the ensuing conversation:
"Day and night I searched for you whilst you were on the run - for three weeks, I never slept, never went home..." "I know, she's a lovely woman your wife"
Likewise, a memorable exchange between the good and bad twins:
"you should be back in jail where you belong" "its not me that did for those two, it was you, the most I could be got for is 'listening with an air of approval' "
All of this comes finally to a head where the twin brothers go toe to toe in a cupboard with only one of them emerging alive. But which one is it?
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