- Dale Parker: The way you look, you shouldn't have any problem at all putting smiles on the faces of those dirty old men that come down here to, eh, straighten out their backhands.
- Jill Munroe: Thanks.
- Kelly Garrett: [having just had a rough massage from Inga] I feel like the Roller derby was just run on my spine. Any minute I thought she was gonna start singing 'Strangers in the night'.
- Jill Munroe: Is Bosley gonna meet you at the party?
- Sabrina Duncan: Yeah, we're gonna do the, eh, fashion designer/model cover.
- Jill Munroe: I thought Bosley hated that swishy designer bit?
- Sabrina Duncan: Oh, he does, this time I'm the designer and he's the model.
- John Bosley: Did you ever feel like the world is a tuxedo and you're a pair of brown shoes? I mean how could my wife do this to me? How? How could she pack brown shoes with a tuxedo?
- Charles Townsend: [on speakerphone] Sorry to interrupt your pursuits of happiness on a gorgeous day like today, Angels, I've had an emergency come up that needs the feminine touch. This one came in from my ex-wife along with a request for more alimony.
- Jill Munroe: I didn't know you were married, Charlie?
- Charles Townsend: [on speakerphone] Once was enough to convince me that I am not monogamous by nature.
- Kelly Garrett: What a shame.
- Harvey Sunday: The name's Harvey. Harvey Sunday from Phoenix. I'm in ladies' lingerie. 'Sunday's Undies' we call 'em.
- Fitzgerald: [posing as George Anderson] I guess being blind has made me philosophical about fate. Where we're all going, life in general. Brooke's passing has made a hole in my life that can never be filled. But if that's God's will, there's not a blessed thing any of us can do about it.
- Jill Munroe: Where's Sabrina?
- John Bosley: Oh, she'll be down in a minute. Do you know that she takes even longer geting ready than you do?
- Jill Munroe: No, Bosley, I've explained that to you before. It's not the dressing time, it's the bath time. I always like to take a long time in the bath, ' cause a bath makes me very logical.
- Paul Terranova: [to Kelly] Don't make a move. It would hurt me to put a bullet through that beautiful body.
- Charles Townsend: [on speakerphone] Right now, I'd better get back to the case at hand.
- Jill Munroe: Oh, what case is that, Charlie? Blond, brunette, redhead?
- Kelly Garrett: [re hard-handed masseuse Inga] Oh, no, I don't think my body can take any more...!
- Jill Munroe: [teasing] Kelly! This could be the beginning of a very meaningful relationship!