Blackadder Goes Forth (TV Series)

Corporal Punishment (1989)

Tony Robinson: Private S Baldrick

Photos 

Quotes 

• [last lines] 

  [Blackadder has found Baldrick and George drunk] 

  Private Baldrick : I think I can explain sir.

  Captain Blackadder : Can you, Baldrick?

  Private Baldrick : No.

  Captain Blackadder : As I suspected. I'm not a religious man as you know, but henceforth I shall pray nightly to the God who killed Cain and squashed Samson that he comes out of retirement and gets back into practice with the pair of you.

  [the phone rings. Blackadder snatches it up] 

  Captain Blackadder : Blackadder. Ah, Captain Darling. Well, you know, some of us just have friends in high places, I suppose. No I can hear you perfectly. You want what? You want two volunteers for a mission into No Man's Land. Codename "Operation Certain Death". Yes I think I have just the fellows.

  [He hangs up and looks at the two] 

  Captain Blackadder : God is very quick these days.

  [George and Baldrick look terrified] 

• [while hungover] 

  Private Baldrick : Permission to die, sir?

• [Baldrick enters the witness box at Blackadder's trial] 

  Captain Blackadder : [whispering]  Baldrick, deny everything.

  Lieutenant George : You are Private Baldrick?

  Private Baldrick : No.

  Lieutenant George : Are you not Captain Blackadder's batman?

  Private Baldrick : No.

  [Blackadder beats his head against the desk] 

• Private Baldrick : Pigeon, sir! There's a pigeon in our trench!

  Lieutenant George : Ah, now this is it.

  Lieutenant George : It's one of the king's carrier pigeons.

  Private Baldrick : No it's not, sir, that pigeon couldn't carry the king.