Bewitched (TV Series)
Open the Door, Witchcraft (1965)
Elizabeth Montgomery: Samantha Stephens
Photos
Quotes
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Samantha Stephens : This is your vacation. You've earned it and deserve the best. I have spoken.
Darrin Stephens : Like a true and loving wife.
Samantha Stephens : Which, by an odd coincidence, I just happen to be.
Darrin Stephens : Best odd coincidence I ever heard of.
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Max : Well, your husband should be very pleased with it.
Samantha Stephens : I don't think so. He didn't wanna buy it for himself.
Max : He didn't?
Samantha Stephens : No.
Noel : That's why you had it put in, huh?
Samantha Stephens : We had it put in for the neighbours.
Noel : That makes sense.
Samantha Stephens : Not to me, it doesn't. Bye.
Noel : Ain't it a shame? Always the good-looking ones. Here, they come up empty.
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Endora : Now, what's all this nonsense about garage doors, anyway?
Samantha Stephens : Well, it's a long, dull story, Mother. I made the mistake of flipping ours open, and Gladys Kravitz saw me.
Endora : Is that the story?
Samantha Stephens : Just about.
Endora : Well, it's not long, but it certainly is dull.
Samantha Stephens : Darrin was afraid that Mrs. Kravitz's curiosity might lead to trouble. He gave up his fishing equipment and bought this gadget for the door.
Endora : That is sad. That's the longest, dullest, saddest story I've ever heard.
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Endora : I thought you said Dobbin needed new fishing equipment.
Samantha Stephens : Dobbin is a horse.
Endora : Yes.
Samantha Stephens : Darrin is my husband, and he wants fishing equipment he pays for himself.
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Samantha Stephens : Now, that's what I call magic.
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Samantha Stephens : Well, it keeps opening and closing... opening and closing all by itself. At first, I thought Mother was responsible... but she swears she isn't. Then I thought it might be the kids in the neighbourhood fooling around... so I watched, but no kids.
Darrin Stephens : No kids, huh?
Samantha Stephens : No. They were all in school. Really, Darrin, it's strange. There was nobody around... nobody around for miles.
Darrin Stephens : And the door kept opening and closing all by itself, huh?
Samantha Stephens : Exactly. It's eerie. It gives me the creeps.
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Darrin Stephens : As a matter of fact, I'm not suggesting, requesting, not even putting in a plea. I am commanding. Calmly, but commanding. No more witchcraft. No matter how tempted or provoked you may be.
Samantha Stephens : You mean like now.
Darrin Stephens : That's right. Even like now.
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Samantha Stephens : If you don't listen to me, we're going to have a fight.
Darrin Stephens : If you don't do as I ask, we're going to have a war.
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Samantha Stephens : What's the matter?
Darrin Stephens : It's... Nothing the matter. It's out of kilter or something. I'll let it rest for a minute.
Samantha Stephens : Oh, by all means. We wouldn't want to tire it out.
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Darrin Stephens : Go ahead.
Samantha Stephens : Go ahead what?
Darrin Stephens : You know. Open the door.
Samantha Stephens : You're kidding.
Darrin Stephens : Do I look like I'm kidding?
Samantha Stephens : You made me swear. My solemn oath. My vow.
Darrin Stephens : But this is an emergency.
Samantha Stephens : You said "under no conditions," and I quote.
Darrin Stephens : I'm glad you remember, sweetheart, but...
Samantha Stephens : Under no circumstances.
Darrin Stephens : Well, that's right. And that's what I meant. But under no ordinary circumstances... and these are certainly not ordinary circumstances. So I uncommand you.
Samantha Stephens : You can't do that. It can't be "no" one minute and "yes" the next. If I give my word, and I gave my word... it's a matter of principle.
Darrin Stephens : It is indeed a matter of principle. And I, your husband, am asking you, my wife, to open that door.Thank you. Thank you very much.
Samantha Stephens : Darrin. I didn't touch that door, honestly.
Darrin Stephens : Of course you didn't, but thank you anyway.
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Samantha Stephens : That is one crazy, nutty, rotten door. If you're gonna believe it and not me, there's no point in going on. So take your pick, it or me.
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Samantha Stephens : I know that I'm perfectly willing to take the blame for anything I do. But I am not going to take the blame for whoever or whatever... is turning that door into an electronic yo-yo.
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Darrin Stephens : Don't be angry. What's there to be angry about?
Samantha Stephens : You don't believe me. That's plenty to get angry about.
Darrin Stephens : I believe you. If you're gonna get this angry, I believe you.
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Samantha Stephens : You see, he means that sometimes women can work magic... with things that don't work. And when that happens, a man should definitely let her do so.