- Daisy Moses: How is your wife takin' all this?
- Rex Goodbody: My wife? Oh, you mean the one they talk about on television.
- Daisy Moses: You got more 'n her?
- Rex Goodbody: I'm only married to that one for 30 minutes each day. The rest of the time I'm footloose and fancy free.
- Daisy Moses: No wonder the poor woman is half-crazed.
- Daisy Moses: Take this down to the truck and don't let nobody know what we're doin'.
- Jethro Bodine: That'll be easy. I don't know, myself.
- Daisy Moses: We're gonna find that Goodbody goomer before he gets on the operatin' table tomorrow.
- Jethro Bodine: How come we have to keep it a secret?
- Daisy Moses: Cause even after seein' what the new miracle drugs like newt eggs and wahoo bark can do, there's still folks that won't accept modern medicine.
- Jane Hathaway: Chief, you'll never guess who's in my office!
- Milburn Drysdale: Rex Goodbody.
- Jane Hathaway: Rex Goodbody. How did you know?
- Milburn Drysdale: He told me he was coming by.
- Jane Hathaway: But why should he come here?
- Milburn Drysdale: Well, he might want to meet the most important and knowledgeable banker in Beverly Hills, or on the other hand, it could be the fifty dollars I offered him.
- Jane Hathaway: You offered him fifty dollars just to stop by? What's he bringing, the keys to Fort Knox?
- Milburn Drysdale: I did it so a fan of his could get to meet him.
- Jane Hathaway: Oh chief, how sweet of you, but you didn't have to do that for me.
- Milburn Drysdale: I know, but I did have to do it for Granny.
- Milburn Drysdale: Anybody that can keep Granny interested in staying in Beverly Hills is more than appealing. He's money in the bank, the Clampett's money in my bank.
- Rex Goodbody: [Granny lifts up the back of Rex's toupee] I think I feel a draft.
- Daisy Moses: I don't doubt it. You ever been through a Injun raid?